Polish Girl & Me...Is She Interested?

Hello everyone,

I am new to forums but have been visiting the site for a while. I will provide some background information about myself and the Polish girl I recently met, then ask questions:

I am an American and recently met a Polish girl who moved to the states several years ago. She was educated here and maintains a steady job as a bartender working in a NYC restaraunt. My job provides me a decent income and allows me to live comfortably. She has disclosed her salary to me and when I do the math, her spending outweighs her income which leads me to believe she has an alternate income that I am unaware of. Likewise, she has no credit cards so what she buys must be on cash/debit payment.

Our relationship began several months ago and she came onto me quick, expressing her interest in me. It wasn't long before we were having sex. Soon after, things became akward. She began asking me to buy more and more for her which I am stupid for allowing but I had developed feelings for her and was in a relationship so I accepted it. Whenever I politely asked her to pitch in for dinner, drinks, movie or whatever was being purchased, she explains that she is Polish/Eastern European and the man is supposed to do that. Now I am not talking about petty cash here, but hundreds of dollars at times.

Recently, she began talking about marriage and moving in together. She also told me she loved me. I have questioned her on love and marriage and the idea of being in a relationship with me to which she hardly provides a good explanation.

Now, I have a couple questions:

1. Is it traditional for Polish men to pay for literally everything? I mean, are Polish men that accomodating toward their partner?

2. Does she appear to have traditional values or am I being used for something else? ...something she is not telling me.

3. Do Polish girls like American men?

This is the first Polish girl I have dated so please pardon my ignorance.

Any insight would be appreciated.

of course not...


for $$$... i think so...


yes

i think she found her cow and she's milking you... sorry...

did you talk with her about what bothers you? about the money issue?

Depends on the economic situation. In your case, you should pay.


You're being used like everyone else... Men has always been used by those blood sucking vampires!!!


Maybe you should ask her if she got a green card?

not for everything... she has to stop spending more then she makes...


poor you...

Thanks for the reply.

Recently, I have been talking to her about it and she becomes defensive, often resorting to the "I'm Polish so understand my culture" type of argument.

She makes no sense.

that's bs...i mean, stupid excuse...

Then go for it ;)

so you approve women sucking money out of men?
make up your mind or don't post rubbish...

if u have doubts.... then put things on hold for a while.


within reason.

if u're daft enough to show her the cash, she'll spend it.

It doesn't really matter what culture it is. The question is:

Do you want to live with such a girl?

It doesn't sound like a healthy relationship.

Dude, you're being used big time. Wise up and dump her. How old are you anyway?

Judge how much she is worth and give her accordingly.(judge by polish standards not by US standards although this is difficult).

I am sure that some modern, open-minded, and feminist people wouldn't agree, but the answer, I am afraid, is YES! Traditionally, as a man, you are expected to cover all restaurant bills, entry tickets etc from your pocket. Traditionally - woman is treated like a princess. This tradition is pretty weak and quite old-school in Poland, but still exist. IMPORTANT NOTE: This not include clothes, jewellery or other kind of gifts.


If she is a person who cherished "traditional values", she wouldn't agree any sex before marriage. Well... Not so soon anyway. You know her better. Answer this question yourself.


Yes, I think that overall that Polish girls like Americans.
You have to understand that Poland is a monolith nation. More or less - everyone in Poland looks, speaks and behave the same way. We haven't got any significant minorities in Poland. That's why Polish girls tend to fell in love in a men who are different from what they know. Let me warn you that, although these feelings are genuine in most of the cases, some cultural differences may be hard to overcome in the long run.


There is no reason to "pardon".
Let me give you some advice. Mark it - this is just my Polish gut-feeling and it may be entirely wrong, but my words for you is: RUN!

Run as fast and as far as you can from this girl.

Unfortunately it is more traditional for suckers foreigners.

Women have been literally sucking men out of money for centuries...

The intuitive feeling I have toward her and her behaviors is not good. I should not have to question her or myself like I am. It does not feel normal nor should it be.

It's great to hear from others on this matter. I'm slowly understanding the Polish culture but in all reality, this girl is sounding more and more to be crazy and that comes with any culture so maybe I should be studying psych right now!

I could provide more details for all of you, for example, details on her upbringing and where she grew up...if that will help.

As I previously mentioned, she really confuses the hell out of me with this whole money situation. I mean, she claims to have nothing, to be in debt, no credit, etc...but can afford all of what she has?! I worry she might be providing services to people for money which is truly disguisting.

Also, another question, are Polish girls big party animals? What makes a Polish girl a "party girl."

But in our times they can usually do all kinds of jobs and can provide for themselves.


Then maybe you should trust your intuition.


Have you asked her about this?

I guess you could stop paying fot her and wait and see if she's going to stay with you.


"Some are, some aren't" (c) :)))))


Probably the same thing that makes girls around the world "party girls", I guess?

I think you may be over-sensitive on this point. All these expensive clothes she wore may be borrowed. Polish girls are known to be life-wise. They are live in a close-knit community and it may be possible that she borrowed all this stuff in order to impress you. To be pretty for you. It may seems that they are live a little over-the-top. You just can't presume that she is a kind of prostitute without any hard proofs. It is unwise and unfair. The statistics in Poland shows that for the last 30 years we spend more than we earn. It's magic. It's our tradition.

Nonetheless - be careful. Polish girl is far away from what you know. But don't judge too fast. Be wise.

Paulina,

Thanks for the info.

As for the "party girl" question, I only ask because this girl can drink alot and she parties hard. She goes clubbing all the time with friends on random nights, gets no sleep and has no problem with it. Not sure if Polish girls are more acceptant of partying or if it's just her.


Unless she earns money from a job other than her full-time one, which she claims she does not (I have asked), then there is no logical explanation for all of what she has. And I do understand Polish women are close-knit...I see that first hand. They really help each other out and provide for one another, but this girl has a home, property, utilities, car, cellphone, insurance and the luxury of going out (not talking about when I'm there to pay). Once you do the math, there is no way she can afford even 2/3 of what she has on her current salary. I highly doubt her friends are making mortage payments.

And I have anecdotal evidence to support my concerns, just no hard proof.

stick to your guts...
if you think it's gonna work - go for it,
but if you have any doubts - take it slow and cut the cash flow a bit, you'll see what happens....

You seem to help her a lot.

1) No, most Polish men don't have the means by which to finance such a lavish lifestyle as hers. They are expected to take her out once in a while and maybe buy her flowers but nothing extravagant. Polish guys would tell her where to go.

2) She is draining your wallet and will likely scarper in due course. There are many hard-nosed people here in Poland that won't think twice about milking you. They won't even think about it, they'll just do it. There are many nice types here but they are harder to find.

3) Some do, some don't. Americans tend to get around more and that can be attractive for girls.

So you think most polish girls are gold diggers?

I can't comment on that as I don't know 'most Polish girls'. Still, always err on the side of caution.

Congratulations. You are a sugardaddy, and if she could outlive her income before she met you you're probably not the first one.

Yes its a tradition that you pay for her if you ask her out on date. It is also common that man financially support woman in other needs but its rather on different terms than those you mentioned. She has no right to tell you to buy her things unless its ur idea to buy her a gift.


Yes she may abussing you.


Why not?

Ok, I've read through the whole thing.

1) She's really interested in one part of You, with that part being your wallet.

2) Polish women, in general, need to be kept on a short leash. If You start to believe in her BS stories you'll soon learn that it is customary in Poland for the guy to buy a girl a bag of uncut, apple-sized diamonds every other weekend.

Well, it is not. The stuff she told you about how much You're supposed to spend on her lazy ass isn't true either. Well, it could be true in case of peasants from near Kielce, Lomza or Rzeszow, but they don't exactly live on American prices if you catch my drift.

In other words you've been duped and you are probably still being duped as I write.

3) Now for the funny part.

She's feeding you a story about her finances... The story doesn't add up... And it does seem like she has plenty of cash... She also works a job that allows her to meet loads of people...

My logical conclusion is simple - she's a part-time or full-time prozzer.

With you she might be looking for a way out ( read: sucker dumb enough to pay her way and marry her ) or that's just the way she meets full-time clients. Notice that you are already being worked on for gifts, restaurants, etc., "hundred dollars at a time" you say. I think she'll soon ask you for a "gift of cash" :-)

Anyways, if You are a decent bloke looking for a good woman You probably should run away from that one like her ***** was on fire.

Um... My grandma is "a peasant from near Kielce" :) My grandpa passed away and she takes care of the farm on her own. She has serious osteoporosis, had her arms broken twice, she had a stroke but she still works in the field. She's really hardworking and can't sit in one place for long. The same is with my mum who is her daughter. I'd say my mum is more hardworking than my dad, the city guy :P


Well, I'd say it's just her... I mean - she's a real "party girl" type, I guess. I wouldn't say Polish girls in general are more party oriented than, let's say, American girls. Or at least I think so ;)

Probably students tend to party more than people of other ages. How old is she?

And, Phurion, to be honest I don't quite understand why are you with this girl? It doesn't look like you respect her much, if you think that she may be a prostitute or something...

- girl, all the writings on the wall point toward her being a prostitute, and the man is just able to use logic, that's all.

Now I know that in Poland prostitution is legal and many a "Polish princess" can give a whole list of excuses why she's spreading her legs for hard currency as well as swear on the Bible that it is just a temporary thing that she'll give up "when she finds the right man".

But in many other countries the woman isn't exactly considered the best candidate for a wife if she's been selling ass regardless of excuse. Most of these places, surprise, surprise, consider prostitution itself a crime.

Not nessecarily, he may be just prejudiced against women from Poland (like you are, I think) or Eastern Europe in general.
But let's assume his concerns are well founded, then I'm aksing him WHY is he with her? :)


As in most of the countries in Western Europe? :)


Oh, you mean prostitution is some kind of a characteristic of Polish women or what? :)))


No sh*t, Sherlock! :D
That is why I asked Phurion why he's with the girl. Now you get it? :)

Midas, I can see you have some kind of a problem. You turn your posts into nationality bashing.