I am originally from India, and I am writing after going through your website about Polish women and marriage. Would it be possible for you to spare a minute to answer a question that I have?
I have been interested in a Polish woman in my university (USA) for some time now. I have asked her out a few times, and she always says that she is busy with study and research. I think she is telling the truth (and not that she is not interested) since she once asked me for my phone number. Besides, PhD students are usually extremely busy for the first few semesters of their study. Recently, I asked if she already has a boyfriend, and she said yes! But, again she said that was not the reason she did not go out with me; she was just really busy.
I am just wondering, is it common for a Polish woman to see multiple men at the same time? Or, is this woman just being nice to me by not giving me a straight "NO"?
I don't think it's common for a Polish girl to date several different guys at the same time. If she's a PhD student, she surely must be busy (she's probably working and studying at the same time, isn't she?). I think she told you she had a boyfriend just because she was... too busy and didn't have time or didn't feel like going out with you at that time. Polish people (especially those who live abroad and try to work and study) are pretty ambitious so if she thinks she won't be able to manage both professional and personal life, that was probably the reason she didn't choose to get to know you.
Also, I feel asking this straightforward question: "Do you have a boyfriend" is not a good idea. Some Polish girls like to be won by frankness, maybe sense of humor or politeness. When you asked this direct question, she might have felt you like to choose the easy route and she deserves something more. Maybe try to share your interest with her, suggest to show her an interesting place -- not ask this question rightaway...
In true love there are no shortcuts; if this is to be a long-term relationship, it needs to be well-prepared. Rush doesn't help true love! :).
If you really care about her, don't give up, but be a little more inventive.
I wouldn't say it's common for Polish girls to date more then one man at a time, but I'm sure there are people who would do that. If your girl is someone who's doing PhD, it's more likely that she's a serious person. If she thought that going out with you might mean something beyond the realm of friendship then she probably didn't know how to politely refuse your proposal, but if she thought that it's a casual friends type of meeting then she was really busy and didn't think she had to tell you about her boyfriend.
If she wasnt interested she woudnt have given you her number and made a better excuse, keep trying, she probably just isnt sure and is waiting to be convinced to go out with you
I think I might not have communicated well in my previous mail. She does really have a boyfriend. I asked her about it only after seeing them togather. "Sweetheart" was the exact word she used.
Well, anyway, best thing for me to do is to politely keep trying, and hope for the best. I should not be asking for everything crystal clear right away anyway.
Maybe she just does not want to date you. Indians make bad names for themselves on campus and in the work place, by dating people who arent from their culture, and getting involved in serious relationships with these people, then suddenly announcing that they must end the relationship due to pressures from family members. Nobody wants to waste time with an indian man who does not think for himself and who would probably return to india for marriage with an indian woman. Until indians become more honest and open minded, people will not consider them as good candidates for relationships. (the whole arranged marriage caste system crap is unappealing for many people because its racism) and who would want to date a racist?
Better question is this, why are you chasing a girl who said she is too busy and even more so, tells you she has a boy friend. Give your head a shake dude!
To the guest who said that all indians are racist, dishonest and closed minded (Guest on 23 March 2006) - all i can say is that you've obviously described yourself perfectly. Being a white half-Polish girl coming from Britain, where a large proportion of our population is Indian, your comments are greatly unfounded and i think it was really unwise for you to attack the Indian guy and his whole culture. I suggest YOU open YOUR mind and get to know some local Indian people and their culture before you start bad-mouthing things you don't understand. I know your kind of people and all i hope is that your racist views don't get you a few broken legs in the future, because i know if you had those views over here in England you be struggling to walk right now!
i do agree to some extent what this guest is saying though ,i fell in love with an indian guy in my teens ,we had a great relationship ,his mother didnt approve but we carried on seeing each other regardless of what she said ,i thought he really loved me infact i knew he loved me then his mother arranged a marriage for him and he married this girl ,he wanted me to be is lover ,i refused .i wouldnt date another indian man ,you fall in love with them then they go and marry some indian girl to please their mothers .
Exactly my point Guest #11 they have a bad reputation!
To the guest who said that all indians are racist, dishonest and closed minded
This sounds like pure ignorance on YOUR part, and what youve just managed to say above only proves one thing INDIANS ATTACK PEOPLE IN ENGLAND! Whats the matter indians cant handle people with opinions? Thankyou for showing us that once again Indians have a bad reputation!
eeeerrr to the person that just quoted me (Guest 13)- i'm a WHITE female middle class doctorate student- why are you implying im an ATTACKING indian man? Hello??? I just obviously know a lot more about different cultures that you do! I also really don't see how such small minded people with such racist views as your own can even manage to string a sentence together for a forum like this?? It really is sad that this is supposed to be a place where people are learning about eachother and their cultures but instead it has turned into a slagging match, where hatred for people you don't understand turns into much more. It is people like you who go around on racist manhunts and quite frankly i am disgusted to even be in a conversation with someone so small minded. There, enough.
I am half indian and half polish... I started to read the post... and then found that I should just state that my cultures (our cultures) generally get on well together... its not a direct answer to anyone... just a statement.
HA HA HA HAAAAA. Listen, There is a polish girl who is married or should I say was married and she had many partners, this is why she is now divorced! There is another who is sleeping with another polish womans boyfriend.....Polish or not, many women can have multiple partners and lie about it and many women can be honest and faithful with just the one partner! Usually if u think someone has multiple partners its probably because u maybe have or think about having multiple partners....... Hang on......she has a boyfriend....HA HA I think you should move along, U don't want her polish man to knock u the fuck out do u??? When someone says "I have a boyfriend" just go! Because I doubt u just want to be her friend!!!
Hey... FJY.... it is not common for a polish women to date many men at the same time ... let alone get married. It is not common to se a polish women married to several guys she may have lovers but that's a different story... ya i agree with doubleface that if she said she has a boyfriend then she probably does ...!!! But a friendly coffee wouldn't kill anyone!!!
I am 30 year old Indian man , I have been in chicago quite a while. I come across lot of Polish people here . I find Polish women very attractive, infact a good freind of mine is a polish girl, she is very sweet!
I dont understand who came up with the idea of Polish women dating multiple men, i dont think its anything got to do with a nationality.It depends from person to person.
looks like someone's trying to shoo away the encroachers. Don't worry Pot there's room enough at the Old Kettle Inn mate. Unless you're doing it Jay Rock style of course. Hip replacement therapy for the underpriviledged. Hop off. :)
That's so not true! There are only a few Indian men who do that...and they are skunks. The real problem with Indian men is their third world, gauche image why they can't live it up in the West, be it with a Polish girl or any western girl.
Usually if u think someone has multiple partners its probably because u maybe have or think about having multiple partners......
yessss that s true;) my ex from Germany was still concerned about, as he used to say, 'all my polish boyfriends';p with time it turned out that he has woman and even children^^
yes, polish women are attractive enough to be with more than 1 man concurently:D although it doesnt mean that they do it. women generally do it, and it doesnt depend on country where they are from! especially women wiht low self-esteem. they need to be admired all the time, to be ensured about their attractiveness etc. but it s just skin-deep engagement, short term relationship. if u find out that ur girl/woman is not faithful, u better leave her immidiately no matter what! relationship should be based on 2person, not more;P
Not stereotyping at all but the polish women I've run into do date many men but when they commit to a relationship they usually try to remain devoted to one. But its not only polish its every girl in my city called chicago. I have noticed that polish women do integrate well into my city's dating culture. And in general its always date multiple partners until to you agree to committ to one.
Some other cultures that have not integrated yet though usually date in one at a time in rapid succession meaning that they decide really fast after they meet you if they would like to be romantic or not. To each his own I guess. Plenty of luck!
