Is this achievable for an EU resident? I've got the stupid piece of paper from the Wydzial Spraw Cudziozemcow that says I have the Permanent Right to Stay*, but the woman at the Urzad Gmina effectively rejected it, saying that without a Karta Pobytu I can only register myself in my own apartment for 5 years.
She's speaking nonsense - as you have the permanent right to stay, she has to register you for as long as it's valid for - 10 years. It's nonsense that it expires after 10 years, but I think the idea is that you should be getting citizenship during this time.
Best bet is to try another dragon - preferably armed with the law in question.
I am still trying to figure out how my "Permanent Residence" is only valid for 10 years.
I think I understand this, actually. You have the right to permanent residence, but the certificate itself is only valid for 10 years - presumably to give them a chance to check into your background every 10 years to make sure that you haven't been naughty. But the next application should be a formality - though you can apply for citizenship in that time instead.