Love / Asking her family for permission to propose to my Polish girlfriend? [28]


I am sure you are right. My girlfriend grew up in those years and i have heard numerous stories of the profound change in culture which took place.

BUT


This would seem to negate your previous quote?

I wasn't trying to give my opinions or views about the Polish family unit, psyche or anything else. I was giving the OP my OWN views on his situation, which as I have already stated is very similar to my own.


As it stands today, I am absolutely convinced you are right. If you read what i said though, I was actually conveying the same thing, that the English sense of family and tradition simply does not compare to the English traditions, simply as nowadays 85% of English people couldn't give a s***e about any of it or for strong family ties and values. That is why i compared polish family values and ties in today's age with that of England in a sadly forgotten past

Love / Asking her family for permission to propose to my Polish girlfriend? [28]

Hi David,
Well, as I am in a pretty similar position to yourself (albeit 10 years older) I would suggest that you follow you gut feelings. My girlfriends parents are in no way ultra-religious and I also agree that her father would probably find the whole affair embarrassing, however personally I think that I WILL be asking for his permission/blessing when it comes to me popping the question. My personal reasons are that I feel that there is a very strong tradition of "family" here in Poland, imagine if you will England in say the 50's and you won't be too far off. It has very little to do with actually gaining his "permission" as such but is more a way for me to live up to those traditions and strong family ties.

Slightly OT, whilst i agree with a lot of what Dominic said above, don't be scared of moving here and trying. I spent 3 years travelling to and from Poland every 4-6 weeks or so, moved here 3 days ago and have my first interview for a job tomorrow morning. In short, to work and enjoy yourself rather than just scraping by will take some work, but from you OP it seems that you aren't afraid of putting the effort and research in. Good luck to you both.

Where in Poland will you be moving to and what work will you be looking for btw?

History / How do Poles feel about what the French did during the first few stages of WWII? [30]

Maybe slightly off-topic, but I do feel it is worth a mention. When i first started coming to Poland, around 3 years ago, I was made very aware that the British account of the events and actions that took place were incredibly skewed (I am a Brit myself btw). After much reading, I have to say that I was forced to agree. I am very happy to see though that this seems to be in the process of being corrected, with more and more memorials being erected to those of other nationalities that died in a particular place (not only Polish, although in my home county of Hertfordshire there was a large contingent of Polish pilots flying both Spitfire and Hurricane fighters). I can only hope that this trend continues as i feel that a more honest and open accounting can only benefit us all.

On topic, i have had many conversations about WW2, not only with my Polish girlfriends father (who is an amateur historian specialising in the subject) but many other adults of a similar age group. I have never encountered the "hatred" that others have mentioned in this thread. Regret? possibly, but never said in anger, even when the Wodka and Piwo have been flowing for many many hours!

USA, Canada / Can you BE Polish without SPEAKING Polish in the US? [256]

My own answer, is maybe. From an outsiders point of view i think it is actually very difficult to empathise truly with a Polish person in matters such as this. I think that it is because it is a country that has had so many attempts made to stop any form or belief in either A-Poland as a country or B-A freedom to express that "Polishness" (excuse the term please) that the subject arouses so very strong feelings, certainly in the generation one or two removed from my own. I struggled with this initially, however if anyone else truly is actually interested in this concept may i suggest the works of Norman Davies to you. He explains this much better than i, and indeed it was my partners father who purchased them for me to help me understand things a bit better. A worthwhile read for anyone :)

Love / Why do Polish girls think they are fat all the time? [42]

I asked my partner this fairly recently (although i hasten to add i phrased the question slightly differently!). The answer suprised me somewhat. She explained that i think that she is beautiful and amazing etc because of the people that i compare them too...namely British girls (where i currently live). She explained that she always felt better in England as she did feel like her weight wasn't an issue over here as much, but then explained that when at home, with so many beautiful women around her, all with a near perfect figure (in the eyes of many foreign men) she felt so much more pressure to lose more weight etc so that i wouldn't be attracted to them instead. I found her truthfulness in this strangely refreshing11 So to sum up, lol, i think that the desire to look good is its own curse, the desire to look slim causes this insecurity in what can become a very self-destructive circle.

Work / Navy Guy seeks help looking for work in Poland! [19]

One of the perks of my job is that we are entitled to "Enhanced learning credits". Basically i can use a one off grant of up to £2500 to further my own education, which CELTA would certainly fit into. I will be moving into central Warsaw. I will be over again at the start of May, and already have one interview lined up with a guy who deals with both civilian and defence communications, however i feel that there is much to be said for "shopping around" a bit before i sign on any dotted line. Teaching certainly does have its attractions, i currently undertake a training role working alongside civilian assessors to further my junior rates education, it also has the advantages of half-terms etc which would be an advantage in bringing my daughter over with me for more extended periods of time.

Work / Navy Guy seeks help looking for work in Poland! [19]

Delphiandomine, i have been in the Navy for just over 8 years, broadly as a weapons engineer and specialising in my chosen role for approximately 3 years now. To everyone else thank you so much for you helpful advice, i had had some thoughts about the oil industry but did not realise there were also opportunities in this field in Poland, so that post was extremely interesting. Delphiandomine, i have also been reading some of your older posts in this forum referring to CELTA courses and believe that this would be a great way to add "another string to my bow"!!

Love / Any particular Polish customs or traditions that I should know about in my relationship? [45]

Thank-you so much all of you, your comments and advice have been really helpful, and a special thanks to maaarysia for reminding me about mothers day!!

Love / Any particular Polish customs or traditions that I should know about in my relationship? [45]

Thank-you so much all of you for the advice and help given to me. unfortunately due to my job i cant be present at all of them, but i know my significant other had a great "Wet Monday"...i mean seriously...why havent more countries caught onto this one??!!! Also, thanks for clarifying the name day situation, that one had me puzzled for a while. 13 days until im back in Warsaw again and i really can't wait!

Love / Any particular Polish customs or traditions that I should know about in my relationship? [45]

Thanks Bzibzioh, but to clarify, when is a persons name day? Is it the same date as their birthday? or is it simply a date of their choosing? Please excuse my ignorance and thanks for the help!