Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]

Thank you for the reply revokenice. Does that mean that he is lying to me? Would our child be recognized in the polish courts? or could the court proceedings be held in Ireland if he does move back to Poland?

His name and signature is on our sons birth and christening certificates. He attended the birth etc etc. He is not denying that our son is his. But he is refusing point blank to support his son.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]

Thank you Harry.

I have to be honest with you and say that I have no interest in going after his parents income. I do not want any financial support for myself. Just for our son.

While we were together I asked him for nothing. I paid all medical expenses, Paid for registration of our son and for his christening. I bought all for the baby,ie. cot, pram, food, nappies, clothes etc etc. I am not looking for any of that back. I just feel that his attitude stinks regarding his responsibility to his son. He told me himself that he is prepared to move back to Poland to avoid having to pay maintenance or having to support his son financially.

I want to stress that I do not want to fleece him of all his income. I just want my son to be supported by his father.

He is a Polish man, and I do not know the customs of polish law and so was only going on his word, which to date has not been very honest (hense the break up).

Thank you Skysoulmate.

I would not tar every man because of his actions. However, he does see our son as (and I quote) "A PROBLEM" in his life.

He believes and has in the past tried to make me believe, that in Poland, men do not financially support their children, Thats the womens job.

I must stress that I have no problem supporting my son on my own. I would live and die for my son. But I also need to know facts so that in the future if push comes to shove I have as much information to hand and can rebuff any more of his outbursts about polish law.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]

Avalon - the irony of the situation is that I only asked for 20 euro a week from him. He is refusing to pay such a small amount. And yet I know you are right, if it goes to court he will be ordered to pay a lot more than that. I honestly believe that he will not come to any agreement on a voluntary basis. He does not believe that he should have to do anything for his son.

Jonni - Thank you for your reply. I didnt think that child maintenance (for unmarried parents) was taken seriously in poland, but then again I was only going by what he told me.

He has told me that if he wants he can hide in Poland. And never be found. (this is untrue I know). I suppose it would be in those circumstances that his parents would have to pay up but Im really hoping it doesnt come to that and I believe that I would not allow it to go that far. I would drop the issue before his son became a financial responsibility for his parents.

Skysoulmate - ha ha yes I mean child support. and thank you for your reply.
Yes he is going to do all he can to avoid supporting his son. That is his way. He only thinks of himself.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]


I think I will have to get in contact with these people. He is not going to resolve this the easy way.


His parents couldnt afford to support his child and I couldnt in all honesty ask them to. They might however try to talk sense to him (If he will listen to sense that is)


I dont want any more than that. That is all I have asked him for. In actual fact I only asked him to buy nappies (12.50 euro per week) and he refused. So that is when I suggested 20 Euro per week. He refused that to.

There is a hard way and easy way to do this, I have tried my best suggesting every easy way that I can think of.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]


Good advice Harry. I wasnt thinking that way. But you are right.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]

Floripa - I am already better off without him. Financially and mentally. But I still believe that he should not be allowed to walk away from his own flesh and blood scot free. even if after a court hearing and order he still does not pay then I will have to deal with that. But for him to point blank refuse to help his son is just not fair. If he could not afford it I could fully understand but this is a man who will buy every latest gadget, every mod con at whatever the expense but wont buy nappies for his own baby. ????? I do not understand that.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]

If it comes to that then so be it. He might even enjoy time in prison. Means he definitely wont have to do anything for or with his son for a while.

Just to update on what I spoke about before.

He is now saying that he will purposely give up his job so that he does not have to pay child maintenance / support.

What kind of man would go that far to avoid supporting his own baby son?????

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]


After the things he has said and done? He turns my stomach.


But he is here in Ireland. If he moves back to Poland and Im in Ireland does he still have to pay if he isnt working? (or doesnt declare that he is working)


Arrogant is not the word for him. I can think of much stronger words for him. He has phoned me 12 times in the past 5 days asking me to help him with paperwork that he does not understand. Not once has he asked how his son is. Not once has he even mentioned his name.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]


I have answered the phone but I flat out refused to help him. His paperwork is not my responsibility. Im sure he can find some other idiot to help him. The strange thing is, that he has no friends. He has burnt every bridge with a lot of people because of his attitude.

Did I mention that he is never wrong? And it is always someone elses fault when f**ks up. That giving apologies is a no no for him.


He knows every word to cut me when he wants (Verbally abuse any mothers child and its going to get a reaction, he knows that that is how to get to me) but as you pointed out, his english is not good enough to fill in forms.


Trust me, I have no pity for him. Im so happy that he is out of my life. The egg shells under my feet suddenly disappeared. And I have started to enjoy life again. But I do not think that he should not have to support his baby.


I would never stop him seeing his son whether he paid child support or not. But I am certain that visitation/custody is not going to be an issue. Our son is 9 months old and he has never given a feed, never changed a nappy and never spent more than 20 minutes alone with his son (his choice, not mine). That is not going to change now that we are seperated.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]


Thank you Skysoulmate. I dont hate him. And I dont mean for my postings to seem that way. I was simply replying to responses that I got here.

I have no emotions towards him other than pure disappointment and sadness that he has chosen to take the path that he has (and taking that path 9 months after his son was born shows exactly how cold his heart is)

I am still looking for advice on the subject and I appreciate every response, The positive and negative ones.
I do intend seeking legal advice on the matter. And will take the advice and course that my council gives me.
In the meantime, I am enjoying my life, enjoying my son. And you are right, my son deserves so much better. He is a little miracle and has brought me so much joy. So you will understand that it amazes me that his father does not see him in the same light as I do. (probably not uncommon but very strange to me)

Thank you again for your response.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]


I have never stopped him seeing his son. I try to encourage him to see him. But he has no interest.
I had our son christened recently, he was refusing up until the day of the christening to attend. That was the second time he had seen our son since our split. The 3rd time he saw him was the next day when he arrived at my house, spent 5 mins with his son and then tucked into the beer that was left over. After a few cans he started to verbally abuse me and He left when the beer was gone.

Since that day I have stopped answering his calls.

I believe that my only option now is to let the courts decide whats best as I do not have the emotional or mental strength to deal with him anymore. I have no interest in listening to his rantings and even if I did, they would make no sense to me as I do not think that he is thinking in the best interest of our son. Just his own best interest.

Thank you everyone for all your advice and views. Please continue to give me advice as all of it has been of great use to me so far.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]

You are right Milky, you do have a very valid point and I know how bad the pay is in Poland. And yes the issue is maintenance. The reason that I asked the question in the first place was because he flat out told me to take him to court for it, (even though I never asked him for anything). He told me that he would run and hide (impossible, I know). He also told me that he would give up working to get out of paying it (a crazy statement if ever there was one). I am not trying to milk him of every penny but his attitude is such that I am incensed enough to take him to court for maintenance.

As for whether he could afford to pay, I know full well that he can. He owns 2 homes in Poland which he rents out, has a very good, well paid Job here in Ireland (which I got for him through a close friend) and if he moves back to Poland he has very good job prospects with one of his friends there.

He is just a man who believes that since I was the one to give birth to our baby then it is my full responsibility to provide for our baby. He is also a man who believes that I am stupid enough to believe everything he tells me without checking the facts for myself.

His attitude is one of bullying. He doesnt want to part with money but in saying that, I do not want his money if he will be a responsible parent to our son. Play a part in his upbringing. Share the responsibility. (even joint custody is an option if he so wishes, I would never stop him from seeing and spending time with his son). However he also does not want to share his time.

Please do not get me wrong. I am not angry or being vindictive in this matter. It is purely just a case of me being dumbfounded that he can reject his son so quickly and easily. And that I believe that he should help with the upbringing of his son without question.

Am I wrong to think that?

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]


I dont want his houses. I just want him to grow up and be responsible. Share the responsibility. I dont think that will ever happen though. At least not willingly.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]

Not too sad of a story McCoy. Im not sorry I met him. I got a Beautiful son out of our relationship. The only good thing to come out of it all. And he is already bringing me lots of happiness and love.

Love / Maintenance for child born between Irish/Polish parents. [60]


Oh I would never ever tell my son that. And I would kill his father if he ever told him that.
I dont want my son to be bitter towards his father. Whatever problems that we need to deal with as his parents I would like my son to have a healthy and happy relationship with his father. That has nothing to do with maintenance as my son is not pay per view.

Law / Polish Citizenship for a foreigner whose parents was born in Poland [174]

Merged: Polish citizenship for irish born (Polish father)

Can a child born in Ireland to an Irish mother and Polish father get citizenship in poland and/or a polish passport? Thanks for all your help.

Law / Polish Citizenship for a foreigner whose parents was born in Poland [174]

Thank you Zed. The childs father is 100% polish. His family still reside in Poland. He is living in Ireland.

Which one is do-able? The passport or citizenship? Or both?

Law / Polish Citizenship for a foreigner whose parents was born in Poland [174]


I do not want to live in Poland or apply for a polish passport/citizenship for myself. But my son is half Polish and I was wondering what he could obtain as such.


Things are still as bad with his father but I have given up trying to show him reason. I am caring for my son alone and I think that is the best way to have it.

However maybe in the future my son would like to be able to travel. I would like him to remain an Irish citizen but maybe he would like to change.

Thank you for your reply Sean BM.

Law / Polish Citizenship for a foreigner whose parents was born in Poland [174]

Thanks SeanBM. I appreciate your help.

Law / Polish Citizenship for a foreigner whose parents was born in Poland [174]

So I should have sent my sons birth certificate to the polish embassy?

Law / Polish Citizenship for a foreigner whose parents was born in Poland [174]

So they might already have a copy of his birth cert? Thats very interesting. I will certainly call tomorrow and find out. Thank you so much for that information. Very helpful.

Law / Polish Citizenship for a foreigner whose parents was born in Poland [174]

I will certainly let you know. thanks again.

Language / Tips on learning the Polish language! [25]

I think the best way to learn the language is to surround yourself with it. It is a very difficult language to learn. ( I have been learning it for 3 years and I still have only a slight grasp of it ) But if you have polish speaking friends, they would be the best teachers. They will teach you the important stuff, and the rest you can pick up from books etc etc.

Travel / How expensive is it to live in Poland in one week? [28]

Thank you very much, that is what I thought. I appreciate you answering.

Language / How do I address a letter to a woman in Poland, [8]


I am on first name terms but it is for an envelope on a chrismas card (which will be posted from Ireland). Which should I use for that?

Thank you.

Language / How do I address a letter to a woman in Poland, [8]

Thank you very much for your help. :-)