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Posts by chelle2926  

Joined: 28 Aug 2009 / Female ♀ 		Last Post: -
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Speaks Polish?: learning

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chelle2926   
3 Feb 2010
Love / My husband going to Poland after gotten his green card. Dreading his visit home to mom. [20]

My husband has finally gotten his green card and is going to Poland for his first visit in 6 years. My question is this....What can I expect when he returns? He has really started being more comfortable around my friends and family, even laughs now and again(when he never used to). He talks more and shares his feelings more(getting him to talk about his feelings was like pulling teeth). I have broken him of his habit of being catered to, he actually helps around the house now, where before it was my "job" to do everything. I guess I'm afraid when he goes to poland to his mom that all the hardwork and progress we have made towards making our marriage work for both of us, will be undone by spending 2 months in his mothers home being treated like a king(especially because he hasn't been home in so long)...not that he isn't treated well at home but we are equal partners now. How do we avoid going back to old habits without taking away from the excitement of his trip to poland? Would appreciate any advice on how to deal with the aftermath of an extended vacation to mom's house?
chelle2926   
4 Feb 2010
Love / My husband going to Poland after gotten his green card. Dreading his visit home to mom. [20]

I don't want him to change to be exactly how I want him to be, then he wouldn't be the man I fell in love with. And yes I meant exactly what I said about breaking him of his habit of being catered to. He expected things without giving in return, because he was used to these things just being done for him in the past. I guess instead of saying breaking him of his habits, I could've said teaching him that he needs to put in just as much as he expects to receive. And his opening up more has nothing to do with me wanting to get all emotional or needing a shoulder to cry on or to just talk his ear off. It has everything to do with getting him to say anything at all. period. He says it's because he expresses himself better in polish and when he trys to translate it to english it doesn't come out right. So we have lovely fights where he is yellling in polish and me in english...makes for great translating later ;). And I am not nagging about him going to poland, but his return home from poland, my life won't go on hold while he is gone. I just wanted advice on how to get him back in the swing of family life when he comes home from having to do nothing for 2 months except show his family how to make his new favorite drink of mojitos. Especially cuz I have never been with anyone who has gone on a vacation for that long before...Im sure there will be readjusting on both sides....just wanted advice on how to make the adjustment easier??

fstop i have considered it...but i have 2 children from my previous marriage one in grade school and i can't get the time off of work...if it was summer vacation we would most definitely be going with him.

beckski and harry...i love your solution....