Love / I want to know, how do I show the Polish women that Im interested in knowing her? [10]


You can't get to know someone through texts. Anyway if you already know her well enough to have her phone number and are texting her regularly then do what Dominic says and just ask her out for God's sake and get to know her in the normal way. Also, it's true that her being Polish is irrelevant in terms of whether she wants to have a relationship. Some single mothers with a young child don't want a guy in their life and some do. Nationality doesn't really have any bearing on that. As for Polish women in general, when it comes to 'dating new guys' they are not at all shy. However be warned that once they decide to get involved with you they expect a lot of committment quite quickly. They expect the relationship to go somewhere - and fast, by 'western' standards.

To be honest though, you sound a bit too immature to be considering a relationship with a woman who has a kid. Just don't start anything if you're not ready to fill the role of step-father at this point in your life.

Work / What should I study for easy job in Poland? [9]


Fair point Delph. Actually in Poland, there are plenty of people with degrees in everything ranging from science to law teaching in kindergartens, but not qualified in early childhood education/care. Some of them do a few courses in child related stuff so their qualifications look a bit better on paper. Anyway, I meant a 'playschool' as in a 'free' play room in a creche as opposed to guided/structured play. Yes I know what you mean about the unqualified roles.However there are professional qualifications for nannies such as the NNEB diploma (I'm sure they have similar in Oz) which are suitable for people who aren't academic but want to work with children, perfect for a posh nursery in Kensington, Lady Di style :)) And it would impress a silly, snobby parent who wants to engage a nanny for her children 'she's a fully qualified nanny you know'. Mind you, who'd want to work for someone like that.......


Not quite true. It depends on the role they're hiring for. If you're just going to be in the baby room in a childcare centre changing nappies, feeding and playing with babies under a year old, then being warm and affectionate, vigilant and having a hefty dose of common sense is the most important thing. Plenty of unqualified women who have been mothers themselves are very capable in that role. But such work doesn't generally pay enough to live on.

Work / What should I study for easy job in Poland? [9]

She says she has basic Polish Lyzko.

@Ewa, Dominic B generally gives very good advice so you'd do well to think over what he says. It's generally not a good idea to go to a foreign country (and that's basically what Poland is for you despite your dual nationality) without some decent qualifications under your belt. There is no quick way to get a qualification that is going to result in employment with long term prospects for making a good living. It would be much easier for you to take up whatever study options are open to you in Australia and go to Poland after you've qualified. If you want to get a qualification in childcare, the most basic one that's worth the paper it's written on will take you a full academic year. If you enjoy the work, then go for a two year course such as Nursery Nurse with a management module in the second year, which would qualify you to lead a room in a playschool and eventually perhaps manage a creche when you have some experience under your belt. Make sure it's internationally accredited. It probably won't matter in Poland but if you're investing two years of your life in studying you want a qualification that will take you anywhere in the world. Don't discount places like Dubai or Japan where they pay well for English speaking childcare workers with a proper qualification.

Work / What should I study for easy job in Poland? [9]

Ewa how long do you plan to spend in Poland? You say you're Australian so you can't work in Poland legally unless you have the right kind of visa. However, if you have some experience in childcare, maybe a job as an aupair would suit you. That would provide live-in accommodation. Otherwise I can't imagine what kind of job you could find, on which you could survive. Salaries for unqualified, unskilled people are really low. Yes you can teach English without a teaching degree. You could take a TEFL training course before you leave Australia which would give you a basic qualification in teaching English as a foreign language, but the competition is fierce as there are plenty of well qualified and experienced native speakers in the larger cities and the work at language schools is often not especially well paid.

Law / Highway Code equivalent in Poland? [7]

Well judging by the way people drive, I would have thought not. However after a bit of rummaging in the internet attic I found this, published last year po Angielsku, it doesn't really compare in range and detail to the British highway code but it contains some of the basic elements:

mib.gov.pl/files/0/1797229/wersjaEN.pdf

Not much about the rights of pedestrians, but plenty about their obligations. Enjoy!

Oh yes, and all the road signs are on Wikipedia.

Travel / What on earth is happening with the Second World War museum in Gdansk ? [5]

I just checked on Trip Advisor. It has the most up to date information, reviews by people who've visited it since it opened and one review from two days ago. Apparently they had been limiting the number of visitors allowed in so had restricted sale of tickets, then gave free tickets and are now charging again and have lifted the restriction on numbers:

tripadvisor.co.uk/Attraction_Review-g274725-d8456607-Reviews-Museum_of_the_Second_World_War_Muzeum_II_Wojny_Swiatowej-Gdansk_Pomerania_Provinc.html

Apparently you by the ticket there (long queues) and then you have to come back at a specified time!! One woman had to wait two hours after buying her ticket! I think it's really a matter of just tootle along, bring your sandwiches (because there's also conflicting information about whether there's any coffee shop/restaurant!), expect the worst and hope for the best.

Love / Polish girl "loves" me, despite not meeting in real life first [56]


Poland is not a third world country. She's an EU citizen with the right to live in any country of the 27 EU member states or the EEA countries so she's in a better position than you, as an Australian who have to jump through hoops to do that.

Love / Urgent Relationship help - wife wants to stay in Poland [118]

Paulina I hope you paid more attention in university than you do here.

Some of my comments were about Polish women in general. Some were about the OP's wife in particular. Just to clarify:

It's my experience that there is a well established custom in Poland of husbands (and sometimes wives, yes I agree) working and living in another country for years on end with visits home ranging from frequent to less so. So it's a cultural norm that doesn't cause any surprise in a community and which many women accept as normal. The OP's wife doesn't think there's anything odd about it so she can't see why he's making an issue of it. In the UK on the other hand it would be considered a very strange, unnatural and unsatisfactory way of life.

However, my other comments about children first, herself and her family next and him last as her priorities were about that woman in particular. Having said that, there are a lot of women, not just in Poland but everywhere, who after ten years of marriage have largely lost interest in their husbands romantically, haven't forged any bond of deep friendship with them and thus their closest emotional attachment is to their children

Love / Urgent Relationship help - wife wants to stay in Poland [118]


Paulina, I'm talking about Polish women married to men from the UK or Ireland or living there with their Polish husband boyfriend. I have known quite a number of them. They live in England or Ireland for a few years but then decide that the ideal situation would be if they could go back to Poland because the money their husband earns would go much further there. It often starts out with the man supposed to join her in Poland after six months or a year, you know get a bit in the kitty and then follow on but the he can't find work there and he ends up staying in the British Isles. I knew one Polish girl who hadn't had her baby yet but had the whole thing planned and - wait for it- he was to visit her every six months! The arrangement is often suggested by the woman in the first place.


And there it is in a nutshell. I was always astonished by the lack of any obvious sentiment but that's the way it is. Polish women have a very practical outlook on relationships. To be honest I think they seem to prefer it as they don't have a man under their feet requiring attention.Once the man gives them the family they want, and provides for that family they are content. That's what they expect from marriage.


I was referring to that particular woman based on how the OP described his situation, not women in general.

Love / Urgent Relationship help - wife wants to stay in Poland [118]

@Britboy, don't take any notice of Gregy. He's a total eejit. He's being deliberately obtuse here because he wants a row with someone. By the way he fears and hates women in equal measures so don't mind all that defending the women of Poland lark. He's an ignorant lummox and not worth your attention.God Bless :)

Love / Urgent Relationship help - wife wants to stay in Poland [118]

@ Britboy, one of the problems with getting advice from the world and his wife is that they tend to bring their own issues to the table and those issues influence the advice they give. That's why people go to professional counsellors. As part of their training counsellors have to go through therapy themselves in case any unresolved issues they have may influence their judgement and ability to be objective with clients.

You'll get plenty of well meaning and conflicting advice from many members so now that you've found out the basics of what you wanted to know, perhaps it's time to withdraw for a while and think it over. Best of luck.

Love / Urgent Relationship help - wife wants to stay in Poland [118]

There are a couple of factors to be aware of.

The law in Poland states that a child's material status should not suffer as a result of their parents divorcing which is obviously not possible, but that's the legal standpoint and the basis on which maintenance is decided.

The judge has complete discretion in deciding the amount of maintenance.
The amount of maintenance is not decided in the same manner as the UK by looking at the father's income and his outgoings. It's decided not on his earnings either, but his potential earnings. So in theory, if the judge thinks the father could get a better paid job than the one he has at present, then the judge can award a higher amount of maintenance than the father can actually afford.

As your earnings are very high by Polish standards, worst case scenario the judge could decide that you are well able to continue paying the amount you currently pay. Remember he doesn't have to take your own expenses into account.

Finally the court usually sympathises with the mother.

Having said all that 1500 per child sounds reasonable at the moment. But she can apply to have that increased every six months I think and believe me, she will. She will be able to find many things which the children 'need' which are going to cost extra, especially as they get older. Now she may not be awarded an increase but she may keep the pressure up.

One final thing. If you start a relationship with another woman in the future, her income will also be taken into account for maintenance purposes. Yes, I know it sounds mad but she is also liable for your childrens' maintenance. There was a thread on here a couple of years ago where an English woman was complaining about the fact that although her Polish husband was in full time studies and living with her in the UK, the Polish court had awarded a high amount of maintenance based on the fact that she was working. She couldn't believe that her salary was up for grabs, but there you go. To jest Polska!

Love / Urgent Relationship help - wife wants to stay in Poland [118]

Britboy, here's a woman's perspective. I'm Irish, married to a Polish man. It's very common for Polish women to expect their husband to work in the UK or Ireland and send money back to them, visiting them maybe once a month or even less often. It's a major cultural difference which people often don't realise until it's too late. Polish women have different expectations of marriage. Your chief role is the breadwinner and supporter of the children and they are the most important thing to her, her own wellbeing and that of her extended family comes next and you come very much last. She will not leave her comfort zone and her extended family to live with you in England whilst you continue to provide handsomely for her.

This isn't really the place to come for relationship advice but for what it's worth, it sounds to me as if this marriage has reached the end of its life. Your wife sounds self-centred, unsupportive and uninterested in you and your emotional wellbeing and that's not likely to change. She will get completely hysterical if you mention divorce, so be prepared for that. And she may make it difficult for you to even speak to your children, let alone see them for a time at least. She will also want her pound of flesh financially so gird your loins and get ready,

I know I probably sound very harsh - I'm not. I actually feel very sorry for you especially if you still love your wife and it's really sad to be parted from your kids and not able to live together as a family.


That's not very likely. Coercion and emotional blackmail are not a good basis for establishing a happy future.

Feedback / Removal of Polish diacritical marks [45]

No, it's not your PC Lyzko. I have the same problem.

Study / Help me In Finding Graphic Design School in Poland [3]

Hi Shawn. I would suggest that you take a look at the Polish-Japanese Academy of Information Technology. You can take your studies in English there. They have an excellent reputation. They don't offer a pure graphic design option but they offer a Bachelors in New Media Arts which is art with an IT/Computer element including programming in partnership with the Academy of Fine Arts in Warsaw. It looks very interesting and to be honest is possibly a better choice for your long term employment prospects, than a classic graphic arts with photography option. You can always continue photography in your free time (plus they mention 'camera work' as part of the course), keep building your portfolio and perhaps consider a post-graduate qualification in it. The fees at the Japanese Academy are ten monthly installments of 1280 zl which works out at around 3,500 euros and theres a 1000zl admission fee which is about 250 euros.

pja.edu.pl/en/new-media-arts/bachelor/general-information

Best of luck with it. Really hope everything works out for you :))

Study / Studying In Wroclaw University of Technology As An International Student [6]

Dominic although I agree with your advice on the whole, I strongly disagree that the OP should choose engineering over computer science. Computer science is a field with plenty of well paid employment worldwide. If anything his best option would be to do a maths degree and study a good computer language such as C++ in his spare time. Many software engineering jobs specify either a maths or computer science degree and maths graduates are sometimes preferred. A strong maths background is essential for senior developer roles. If the OP has a passion for software development, I can't see the point of pushing him into general engineering.

News / How will BREXIT affect the immigrants in UK and Poland. [1114]

As far as Brexit goes the Leave side didn't need any logical arguments because they didn't need to win, they just needed the other side to lose!

As for the Lisbon Treaty, the No side had campaigned on the basis that it would mean abortion and the end of Irish neturality amongst other things. The government got the EU to agree to certain concessions for Ireland to ensure that we could opt out of those unpopular aspects thus the Treaty was accepted second time round.

News / How will BREXIT affect the immigrants in UK and Poland. [1114]

You don't win referendums with emotional arguments. That might work in America (witness Donald Trump's load of old waffle speech at his inauguration) but in the Islands, you need to present logical arguments.

I think the problem was twofold. The Remain side were confident that it was already a done deal, that the referendum was just a formality. The other problem is that the Brits have no history of referendums and neither the government nor the electorate are expereinced with or accustomed to them. Before the Brexit one, they'd only had two in which the whole of the UK was required to vote and one of those was back in the 1970s.

Over the years we've had loads of referendums in Ireland and we always receive detailed information delivered to the door, in which the government explains clearly and unemotionally what you're being asked to vote for and the consquences of either a yes or not vote. Of course there's lots of discussion and debate on television and various materials sent to the voters by each side but the government does a great job of explaining it in the first place and knows how to present its own case effectively.

News / How will BREXIT affect the immigrants in UK and Poland. [1114]

Yes, that's why it's called the future and not the past :)) But I think that what will emerge during the negotations is the degree of division and lack of real unity between the various EU members as each will be fighting their own corner, naturally. Every nation will be looking at how Brexit will affect their country. For some like Ireland, the impact is huge, for others who don't have the same ties to Britain, less so. Already in the draft guidelines Ireland's 'special' status has been acknowledged with the proposal that the Common Travel Area be maintained and no hard border imposed, and now the Latvian EU Commissioner Valdis Dombrowskis has intimated that Ireland may be granted certain borrowing and spending exemptions based on the fact that the Irish economy may lose up to 20 billion over the next decade as a result of Brexit. I think quite a lot of other members won't like that even though some of them already benefit from the 'exceptional circumstances' clause for other reasons.

Work / Studies In Poland, is it easy to survive on part-time jobs? [259]

What astonishes me is that there's an entire thread here about the subject and instead of reading it, the poster asks the same question that's been asked and very comprehensively answered a gizillion times already. Quite frankly, if it's too much effort even to spend half an hour doing research on the topic, then it doesn't bode very well for his future studies and career.

News / How will BREXIT affect the immigrants in UK and Poland. [1114]


It could turn out as you predict but somehow I don't think so. I think Brexit will go ahead. If the UK re-enter the EU it will be a few years down the road, maybe ten years and it will be an overhauled new EU, not the present arrangement which is becoming more and more unwieldy and messy. Next thing we'll have is Israel wanting to join! The EU has become like the Eurovision song contest.

News / How will BREXIT affect the immigrants in UK and Poland. [1114]

Of course it's reversible. The powers that be all make up the rules as they go along. The 'rules' may presently say there's no way back but if the EU wants to let the UK back in at some point, they'll simply change the rules to make that possible. As for people saying 'oh but all the other states would have to agree' in theory yes, in practice no. If the Brussels big wigs want Britain back, then back they will be allowed to come.

News / How will BREXIT affect the immigrants in UK and Poland. [1114]

And according to this it could be Ireland:
independent.ie/opinion/columnists/colm-mccarthy/colm-mccarthy-ireland-could-be-biggest-brexit-loser-after-the-uk-35585777.html

And according to this it's Ireland, Cyprus, Malta and Luxembourg:
cnbc.com/2017/03/01/ireland-cyprus-malta-and-luxembourg-to-be-hardest-hit-by-brexit-kpmg-report.html

Let's see how things pan out shall we, instead of pointless speculating. There's nothing to be said really until 29 April at earliest when the draft negotiation guidelines will be voted on by the other EU members.

News / How will BREXIT affect the immigrants in UK and Poland. [1114]

@ Tobias, No, that's not how it works. As an EU citizen you cannot be expelled from an EU country because you don't have a residence card. Your personal rights override administrative requirements. You can be subject to sanctions, for example a fine but you can't be deported. Therefore under the proposed guidelines any Brits living in any EU country before 29 March 2019 would be allowed to remain in that country after Britain exits. I should add, that the only condition you need to satisfy is that you have sufficient resources to maintain yourself. And that's it. No official paperwork or permits are legally required of you. If you are unable to maintain yourself financially however, then yes, you can, in theory be hoofed out.

News / How will BREXIT affect the immigrants in UK and Poland. [1114]

The first guidelines for the the withdrawal treaty have been issued.

"Among other elements in the eight-page document, which Mr Tusk will outline at a news conference later, is a priority to settle legal uncertainty for EU expatriates living on either side of the new EU-UK frontier.

It says rights acquired before a cut-off on the day Brexit takes effect should be retained."

The hope is that all the remaining EU states will agree to these guidelines by 29 April. The guidelines will form the basis of a mandate for chief EU negotiator Michel Barnier.

Travel / Warsaw in May, Auschwitz, Kantor in Old Town [33]


Well then don't bother with the jewellery. You could take a bike ride along the Wisła quite easily and take lots of photos.

@Dominic, now you're showing your American perspective on the world Dom! Not everything originates in America :)) The giving of a 'bethrothal ring' is a very old custom though it wasn't always a ring, sometimes other jewellery. De Beers didn't invent it, they merely developed and gave new life to an an existing theme, good old R&D.


There are shops in the Stare Miasto in Warsaw that give certificates of authenticity with your purchase, though of course the certs may not be genuine!

Travel / Warsaw in May, Auschwitz, Kantor in Old Town [33]


I'm not sure about that for two reasons Spiritus. Firstly these recitals are culture not cabaret and the pianists are all dedicated classical musicians who might be just a wee bit offended by such a suggestion. Also the statue of Chopin is in a very prominent position and would be surrounded by a sea of curious onlookers. Personally as a woman, I would feel uncomfortable in that situation. There are lots of lovely leafy, secluded spots nearby and some benches where you can sit. Paulina's suggestion is lovely but again you'd need the boat to yourself, I wouldn't want a couple of strangers practically sitting on my lap!

@Reeko, have you thought about a ring to mark the occasion? There are lots of beautiful jewellery shops in Warsaw and a good range of prices, you don't have to pay a fortune. You could perhaps go the Stare Miasto next day and get an amber ring as it's a traditional souvenir to bring from Poland and they have some fabulous designs. If you're religious you could keep the Chopin theme going and go the church where his heart is kept, the Baylika Świętego Krzyźa, and light some candles in thanks for the happy years you've shared and the hope of many more to come :))

I wouldn't go for the Pałac Kultury as it would be full of tourists and quite possibly gangs of kids on school trips.

Travel / Warsaw in May, Auschwitz, Kantor in Old Town [33]

You could take her to the Royal park of Łazienki in central Warsaw. There are lots of beautiful spots there including the 'Palace on the Isle' with a lovely waterside location. If you go on a Sunday there are open air Chopin concerts. They have afternoon and evening ones. You can hear the music for some distance around the park so you could propose in an historic Royal location, to the strains of Chopin on a summer's evening, what could be nicer? :))

Genealogy / Why did(do) Poles sometimes have German first names? [28]

Have been meaning to mention this to you CB. He most definitely would have been baptised whatever his family's religion. Quite apart from the fact that most people back then were sincere believers, it was the social and cultural norm. However, it's most unlikely that he was Orthodox. But what religion was his son, your grandfather??

Regarding records, although he was certainly baptised there's no guarantee that the priest recorded it in any register, they didn't always you know.

By the way, if it's an unusual surname, it's always worth contacting other people who are researching the name, as even if you're not related, they may have turned up some information on your own family during their research.

News / How will BREXIT affect the immigrants in UK and Poland. [1114]


December 2017 is the target for the basic bones of the Withdrawal Treaty which will include treatment of British citizens living in the EU and conversely EU citizens living in Britain. October 2018 should see the final draft of the treaty for approval by all concerned. Talks regarding a trade deal may not even begin until after the two year exit procedure and the whole process of exiting may take up to five years.