Work / Some cold, hard facts about teaching in Poland for newbies [101]


I guess it depends on how your classes are organized. For me, 40 hours of class time means about 60 hours of "out of the house" time. I have to drive from company to company, allow for traffic, park and from time to time eat something and even use the WC.

Life / $3,000-$4,000 a month - would we have enough money to live in Poland? [273]

As a person who has rented I can tell you that your landlord may very well enter your flat without making an appointment. I am not talking about the law, but rather the practice. It happened to me when I was renting and quite a few of my friends who rent out their places feel it is perfectly alright to do it. I, as a renter or rentee, feel that it is a violation but I am just giving you a heads-up. Oh...what my friend found in her tenant's apartment one day...

And about the cats, I think you should inform the owner. I never rent to pet owners for the simple fact that I am severely allergic to animals.

UK, Ireland / Advice to Polish parents in the UK about weaning babies? [15]


I know, that was my point. And get this, my m-i-l salted her grandson's jarred baby food!!!!

UK, Ireland / Advice to Polish parents in the UK about weaning babies? [15]

Hi-
While I am not Polish, I live in Poland, have given birth in Poland and have breastfed in Poland too.

In my experience, it was assumed that I would breastfeed my children. I suppose that if I had not been planning to breastfeed my children, I would view that as pressure to breastfeed. All medical professionals that I encountered (throughout the first year and on) encouraged me to breastfeed as long as possible (even during the time I had mastitis and an operation). The expected norm seemed to be 6 months with supplemental cereal. The next additions were carrots, bananas, plums, etc. It was not unusual to meet other moms in the waiting room of the doctor's office who were still breastfeeding their 2 year olds. I fed my children to about one year plus or minus.

That's talking about the medical professionals...my mother-in-law was another story. Not only did she criticize my breastfeeding (as a fact), she criticized how I breastfed. She was sure that my children were starving and whenever I exited the room tried to feed them something entirely inappropriate (tomato soup made with smoked ribs and cream with rice - yummy but not for a 1 month old baby). There was a lot of talk about "in my day..." and she couldn't believe I was exclusively breastfeeding for 5 months. Additionally, some of my friends fed their babies things I thought were inappropriate such as mashed potatoes with butter and salt for a 3 month old. Basically, Polish moms get mixed signals from friends, family, media and doctors.

I also feel that Polish moms go overboard with the teas and juices. I didn't give my kids anything but milk or water until they were over a year old and I have never seen a need for "herbatki". Anyway I read a research study which concludes that fennel/dill tea actually causes gas in babies.

USA, Canada / What are the odds of my girlfriend getting a USA tourist visa? [70]

In my opinion the odds are good that she will get a visa esp. if she speaks English well at her appointment and explains what her plans are. I think saying that she is planning to travel (I understand that those are her real plans) is ok and that it is not beyond reach financially for some people in Poland. She should feel free to say that she spent a year on an exchange program and she is going back for a visit and to practice her English before she finishes her last year of high school. She should feel free to say that fortunately for her, her parents will be sponsoring her trip. There's no shame in that.

About getting married and taking advantage of student aid, please contact an Embassy to check what constitutes public benefit in their definition. I remember that when I applied for my husband's resident visa (he is Polish, I am American) there was something in there about my husband not being able to use public benefit (I imagine for some time period).

Also, regardless of the income of parents, student loans are available to all (US) students in the US. My parents are "pulling in 6 figures" as well but I paid for my studies 100% by myself with the help of student loans, a job, and some academic scholarships. I was not eligible for any grant money but loans were not a problem. Paying them back...that was a problem.

And what people are saying about the lack of jobs in the summer for English teachers is absolutely correct.

USA, Canada / Things that Polish-American should know about Poland. [168]

Regarding the Catholic church - Polish Americans should know that the Catholic church in Poland is not the same as the Catholic church in America. In order to partake of the same "services" for lack of a better word, completely different requirements are in place, handed down as God's law but are in fact often the arbitrary decision of one priest. I have often met with the statement that the Catholic church in America is not the "real" church.

In addition, if you are not interested in involving your children in the church, prepare yourself for a lot of comprises. If compromise is too much for you, prepare to feel oppressed.

News / Hydraulic Fracturing in Poland. [14]

Amen. Let's keep each other posted.

P.S. I am from PA.

USA, Canada / Things that Polish-American should know about Poland. [168]

I don't quite get the whole discussion about who is a real Pole or not, but I do agree that Polish-American people should get to know something about Polish history. I wish everybody knew more about Polish history, not just Polish-Americans. Hmmm, does that make me a little bit more Polish than American?

On a side note - American people like to identify themselves with their origins, no matter how far or tenuous. Some people think that is artificial or annoying, but for me as an American, I think it is sweet. My father's side of the family is definitely Polish (Michalik, a few generations back) but that is not why I came to Poland. I came here to work.

If it were possible, I would suggest that Polish-Americans move (not visit) to Poland for a time and foster relationships with Polish people, learn the language, read the newspapers, watch tv, and travel. I have my Polish husband and family to fill me in on cultural things I just don't understand, but if I didn't have him, I would hire somebody to discuss "Polish" stuff with. That is an expensive proposition but worthwhile.

P.S. We have been discussing the whole "Polish" thing lately at home. How American am I? I was born and raised in the US. I didn't know any Polish when I came here. I can speak ok now. I am married to a Pole, my kids were born in Poland and they speak Polish, but they are American, too. It is crazy!!!!

Life / $3,000-$4,000 a month - would we have enough money to live in Poland? [273]

I am American and I agree. Some people may scoff at the idea that $3000. doesn't allow for an "American" lifestyle but it is true. Having said that, you can easily adapt esp. since (as you described it) it is only temporary.

I also moved to Poland to work for an American co. for 2-3 years. It is more than 10 years later and I'm still here. I never intended to live here but each decision I made further entrenched me here (esp the Polish husband part). But I am not complaining, just talking about intensions and the effects of our decisions.

I have found that Polish women tend to be quite close to their families (But I think you got that considering your wife has brothers but she still needs to help out). I think that you both can be prepared for a lot of mixed feelings during this time about where you want to live, where is home, etc.

Good luck to you and your family

Love / Advice Please! Meeting my Polish boyfriend's parents!! Gifts, customs... [105]

I hope you like to eat ;)

News / Hydraulic Fracturing in Poland. [14]

Plastic Pole- My family and friends have experienced first hand the damage fracking can do (in my hometown in the US). I hope we can avoid the same but who will speak up against the "frackers"?

USA, Canada / Things that Polish-American should know about Poland. [168]

I have lived in Poland for quite awhile so I am basing my answer on the impression my 68 year-old aunt had when she visited Poland a few years ago. (It was her first visit abroad and she considers herself "Polish".)

I think that Polish-Americans, like my aunt, who plan to visit Poland (and may have heard about Poland from other family members) should know that Americans are generally well-liked in Poland...but please don't set foot on Polish ground like you are the second coming of Jesus Christ. Another thing is that Poland is not as cheap as some would think especially compared to the American dollar.

So, my aunt who loves to research our family history just showed up to various "family members" (aka complete strangers) homes unannounced, unable to speak Polish, and expecting to be welcomed and expecting someone to understand her. Bless those souls, they did welcome her but knowing my aunt they didn't have much of a choice. Also my aunt complained that dinner in a large tourist center cost a whopping 20 dollars but when she misunderstood the internet cafe pricing she was prepared to pay 400 PLN for one hour of internet time - that's my crazy aunt.

USA, Canada / What should I bring back from the U.S. to Poland? [46]

I usually bring back clothes (cheaper in the US but the price gap is closing), vitamins (huge price difference, and ziploc bags (don't laugh, everybody is right, you cannot find them here). One last thing, I brought food coloring. It comes in an inexpensive little pack in the US and in Poland it comes in a quantity I would never use in a lifetime of birthday cake decorating.

I don't think it makes sense to bring food items except maybe something like candy or gum or something. I have a recipe for pancakes that is just as good or even better than any mix ;)

USA, Canada / American Marrying Polish woman - visa question [41]

I got married a long time ago, but I remember specifically being told in the US that getting married on a tourist visa would cause my husband problems with immigration. I don't know if they meant officially or if they would just give us a hard time. In the end, we got married in Poland.

I got all my information (regarding US wedding) from the US government. I used the web page and when I had a question, I called the hotline. The regulations are not always easy to understand but access to them is not a problem. For getting married in Poland, we got the info we needed from both the US Embassy and Polish local government. It took us almost 6 months to the day from applying to get married to actually getting married. It involves a court date and a home visit by the police - that means that the American future-spouse has to reside in Poland during this time.

Our very good friends were able to obtain a fiance visa even after the future bride was sent back to Poland from the airport in the US under the suspicion that she was planning to work. I think she was trying for her third 6-month stay under a tourist visa with no known income. They still received a fiance visa within the next year, but she did have a lot of problems with red tape.

On a side note, in order to receive a fiance visa and later a residence visa you need to prove as a couple (or with extended family) that you are able to financially support yourselves. FYI your idea of supporting yourselves and the govt's idea can differ dramatically.

Good luck!

PS I think the reason many people think there is something wrong with your situation is because you refer to your fiance as a lady you know.

Language / How can i teach my child Polish language? (I'm Russian, my wife is Polish) [35]

I think first you have to decide what languages you would like your child to speak. After that you teach your child those languages just as anyone teaches their child a single language. Supplement with reading materials and dvd's.

We would like our children to speak English and Polish (we live in Poland). We started out with each of us speaking our own language only but that left our kids a little deficient in the English department. Now we speak English at home and Polish everywhere else. The result is that we have 2 little bi-lingual kids who at this moment prefer Polish. It will be up to us as they grow older to supplement their English but luckily we are equipped for that. Really, for now it is just as simple as speaking to them.

Good luck!

USA, Canada / PolAm style Thanksgiving? [35]

I think it is more of -no good deed goes unpunished.

USA, Canada / PolAm style Thanksgiving? [35]

Hi -

Regarding turkeys in Wrocław:

One year I asked at Epi market if they could order me a fresh, whole turkey. They did but it was a bit pricey. Another year (after we found "our" butcher) we asked our butcher to arrange a turkey for us. Just as good, half the price. Frozen turkeys are available at Carrefour for sure. This year we are not doing the whole bird either. It is just too much hassle and I don't really enjoy having my arm up to the elbow in bird.

Happy Thanksgiving

PS Sweet Potatoes are cheaper at Piotr & Paweł than at Epi :)

USA, Canada / My wife wants to return to Poland...but I want to stay in the US [155]

Funny. You are right about one thing. We won't thank you :) But honestly speaking I do not see this as an aspect of the female mind. How many men still think they can fit into a 32 inch waistband despite all other factors (stomach, mirror, scales) indicating otherwise. Maybe it is some survival mechanism related to self esteem :)

Anyhow, the "child's best interest" is always important but in this situation it doesn't really help them decide. First of all, let's remember that Jozek is still currently married and wants to be married and raise his child (if I remember correctly 2 years old). The child's best interest would be served probably if they stayed together in whichever country they can do the best in.

We often think of the child's best interest in divorce when we are comparing 2 countries with dramatically different standards of living (there was the case a few years ago with a little boy between Cuba and the US). Poland and the US are not so dramatically different, making the decision even more difficult.

USA, Canada / My wife wants to return to Poland...but I want to stay in the US [155]

Jozek-
I really feel for you esp considering your fear that your wife may take your child to Poland and never come back. When we had to make the same decision, we lived together for a couple of years in each country and then sat down to hash out the details. I am American and my husband is Polish and we are both fond of Poland and America. The conversation between us was not each one of us defending our own country. Honestly, we were not sure which place would be better for us. At that time we chose Poland and here we are. Sometimes we second guess our decision but we re-evaluate and move on trying not to idealize the other country and demonize the one we are living in. If possible go with your wife for an agreed trip explaining that you cannot move now. Collect info about jobs, prices etc and try to sit down and have a sincere discussion about what would be best for your family as a whole, not just your wife.

Good luck and take care.

Life / Kindergarden / daycare in Wroclaw [4]

Hi-
Pre-schools/kindergartens have "recruitment" periods when you have to fill out some forms and count up your points. But that's for public schools and it is only once a year. You may have better luck finding a private pre-school/school. Are you thinking about an English-speaking place or Polish-speaking? Do you know what part of the city you'll be living in?

Feel free to send me a pm or email and maybe I can help.

Good luck!

USA, Canada / Differences in How Polish People Raise a Child and How Americans Raise a Child [149]

Before coming to Poland, I had heard that Polish parents spank their kids more than American parents. I had also heard that Polish students were master cheaters. While I have found that indeed Polish students can find ingenuous ways to cheat, I haven't noticed that any more of my Polish friends spank their kids than my American friends.

Maybe spanking is going out of style, so to speak, esp with the popularity of the Supernanny tv show??

Work / Working in Poland in a Non-Polish Speaking Job? - How? What? (no teachers!) [16]

I'll go next:

Now I'm a teacher but I started out working for an American company as PR Director. I couldn't speak any Polish at all then.

Real Estate / Multiple owners of agricultural property in poland [2]

I bought a property (agricultural land plus house and out buildings) that at the start of the process had 6 owners. During the process of buying one person died and then there were more owners who had inherited their part. After the inheritance issue was taken care of, all of the owners set one owner as their legal voice in making decisions about the property. That made the further negotiations and paperwork easier. Having said that, all owners were required (for some reason) to come to the final signing of the contracts, etc.

If I understand you correctly, the land was inherited by 3 people, you being one of them. Maybe one of the heirs could be assigned as the person responsible for the land while leaving the ownership of everyone intact. It is also possible to assign some guardianship to someone who is not the owner to take care of formalities such as paying the taxes if you are out of the country.

Good luck to you!

Food / WHAT DID YOU EAT FOR POLISH EASTER TODAY? [45]

When I was a child in America, we did the Easter egg hunt thing after church. I heard that here people do an Easter nest. I've only heard that from a couple of people. Is it regional or maybe old-fashioned or maybe "new"-fashioned? Has anyone heard of that?

kielbasastories.blogspot.com

Food / WHAT DID YOU EAT FOR POLISH EASTER TODAY? [45]

Do you take a symbolic amount of food in your basket or everything? The first (and last) time I took my basket to church with my mother-in-law (packed with just a small amount of food), we stood in church next to a lady who had everything, whole links of sausages, a whole loaf of bread, a whole root of horseradish, etc. Does anybody do that anymore? BTW, my basket was horribly underdressed ;)

kielbasastories.blogspot.com

USA, Canada / Differences in How Polish People Raise a Child and How Americans Raise a Child [149]

C'mon, be creative! Do you really need a bedroom and bed for sex with your spouse? Assuming that you have more than one room in your home, what's the problem?

Both my kids are asleep now, so I'm sure you'll all understand why I must excuse myself from the conversation ;)

USA, Canada / Differences in How Polish People Raise a Child and How Americans Raise a Child [149]

I also cannot stand those herbatki monsters who insist that I am harming my child because I have never given them herbatka. I even found research done that those dill (koperek) herbatki CAUSE gas not alleviate it, but Babcia knows better. BTW some people give their infants glucose from the pharmacy.

When you have a baby in Poland, a midwife comes for a home visit at least once. The midwife who came for a visit with our second child wrote us a long list of things our 2-week old baby needed including herbatka and medicine for loose stool. Any experienced mother should know that infants have loose stool for some time and that it is normal but if a so-called medical professional advises Polish moms to do it, those moms can be confused. Add that to the pressure coming from Babcia and well, your head can spin.

And about the antibiotics, it depends on the doctor really. Our family dr is quite conservative about prescribing them but when I visit another dr at the practice I am sure to get antibiotics for our kids no matter the illness. At our last visit (for a hacking cough) she declared the kids healthy and acted like I was wasting her valuable time and then prescribed my kids 7 medications one of which was an antibiotic. I politely asked for an explanation and then demanded an explanation when none was given. I was asked to leave the examination room and to take my kids with me. I made an appointment immediately for "our" doctor who told us antibiotics were not needed and with some syrup our kids were fine in a couple of days. Hacking coughs often come at the tail end of colds for smaller kids and while they sound awful are often not serious.

kielbasastories.blogspot.com

USA, Canada / Differences in How Polish People Raise a Child and How Americans Raise a Child [149]

Sokrates-You made me laugh :)

I am one of those backwards American mothers but the difference is I am raising my child in Poland. Yes, it is no big deal if a kid has a pacifier or a bottle when they are 4 or 5 but what for? Neither of my children ever used a pacifier and could drink from a cup at one. Why? Because they wanted to learn. They still had a bottle and later a no-spill cup.

I am sad for the 4-year-old girl from my daughter's pre-school who still drinks from a bottle and eats jarred baby food and baby teething biscuits while my daughter is "King of Breakfast" awarded not for cleaning her plate but for feeding herself. Even my 1 1/2 year old is proficient enough with a spoon to feed herself a lot of things and she does it because she wants to. She screams, "Me do" or "Ja sama" and I oblige. Maybe that's backwards to some people but I think it is natural independence.

USA, Canada / Differences in How Polish People Raise a Child and How Americans Raise a Child [149]

I agree that most of what you describe can be attributed to your wife's own personality but I think the dressing the child too warmly is a Polish thing. I am American with 2 small kids in Poland and often have complete strangers (esp older women) inquire if my children are cold. Inquiring is too polite to describe it. In fact they are usually insisting that my children must be cold to which I ask "Czy my sie znamy?". Sorry but for me 50 F is not cold enough for a snow suit.

You might also begin to notice that (in my opinion) many Polish moms and grandmas are obsessed with their kids food consumption. On one hand it is good, they make a lot of homemade things which I as a "Polish" mom do too but many moms/grandmas cannot tolerate it when a child skips a meal because they simply are not hungry. It's a big issue between my mother-in-law and I.

Work / Education in Poland - system and structure [118]

I have lived in Poland for quite some time and I can assure you that the opinion of Karolina that Poles are better educated than the British or Americans is quite a common opinion here. I have encountered countless times the opinion that Americans are uneducated excluding those who attend the best internationally known universities.

I am American, educated in America so I do not want to agree with that opinion but I sat next to a classmate at university who asked me where Mexico was on the map and another classmate who spelled "education", "ejucation". In addition, I was a teacher in the US and had to teach my high school students the CONTINENTS and BODIES OF WATER!!! I also had a student who couldn't read and I had to fail him. His failure was overruled by my supervisor. I think a lot of kids fall through the cracks in America and many people are under-educated for whatever reasons.

I have noticed that students in Poland have a lot more material to learn by heart than in the US. Has anyone else noticed that?

kielbasastories.blogspot.com