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Posts by f stop  

Joined: 9 Dec 2009 / Female ♀ 		Last Post: 9 Oct 2015
Threads: Total: 24 / In This Archive: 21
Posts: Total: 2493 / In This Archive: 1879 		From: USA, dirty south
Speaks Polish?: tak
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Displayed posts: 1900 / page 13 of 64
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f stop   
14 Dec 2012
News / PiS wants symmetry for minorites living in Poland [71]

My take is: if you don't want to put signs in foreign language, then don't. If you do, then it should be because it is to your advantage, like fewer people wandering around, lost, looking for directions. But it shouldn't be expected that other countries do the same thing - it is their decision.

As far as the father and speaking Polish to his kid: his claim is sketchy. Most parents would try to prove that they are the good guys so they can see their kids. The guy sounds like a pompous ass, but that's just my opinion.
f stop   
10 Dec 2012
Love / Aliments and abortion (I was married to a Polish guy) [64]

That's what I suspect as well - they got married so she could stay in Poland, and then she got pregnant. No other explanation why he would freak out this bad, and worry about losing his job.

I think he fully expected that she gets an abortion, and her refusal made him believe that she did this on purpose.
But, lets give her a benefit of doubt..
f stop   
10 Dec 2012
Love / Aliments and abortion (I was married to a Polish guy) [64]

Ofcourse it is an option but not when i am pregnant after i got married and just swallow the disgrace HE just caused me. So if I go home :) that will be too easy for him

Going over what HE did, didn't do, should have done is completely unproductive.
Think more about what you should do.
At this point, the most important thing for you to do is to avoid stress and get lots of rest. Think about how to do that now.
f stop   
9 Dec 2012
Love / Aliments and abortion (I was married to a Polish guy) [64]

"What if I get pregnant?" would have been a logical question to ask when the contraceptive pills were in some other luggage and unsafe sex was to be had. That's the point I wanted to clarify.

the reason I'm getting so involved in this scenario is because I am friendly with two (not one, but two!) couples; both women want to have children (one never did before), and both men are adamant against it. Both men are like, "if you get pregnant, we are OVER" adamant, and let their better halves know it . One guy likes to move around a lot, and the other thinks we should not have any children at all (and kill ourselves jk!) So this subject comes up a lot. It's easy to say - the guys should wear a rubber, but in both cases the women are totally entrusted with the contraception methods. So, I'm sure that in the case of a pregnancy, culpability would be discussed to a minute detail.
f stop   
9 Dec 2012
Love / Aliments and abortion (I was married to a Polish guy) [64]

Ironside

what are you talking about? Obviously they have some problems communicating with each other! His reaction is really strange if their never discussed children or anti conception!

what are YOU talking about? They discussed children, he didn't want any, and it was up to her to make sure it didn't happen for next 5 years.
f stop   
9 Dec 2012
Love / Aliments and abortion (I was married to a Polish guy) [64]

he wants me and the child out of his life

I know most people do not agree and believe that mother should make the guy pay, but I would rather live in poverty than force any contact with the man that does not want anything to do with me or the child.

I have never asked for a penny from my son's father, and this allowed for a good relationship between us all. I finished school and made more money than he ever did. And he, as opposed to your husband, was all excited about the child, he just didn't think that the party life we were living needed to end.
f stop   
9 Dec 2012
Love / Aliments and abortion (I was married to a Polish guy) [64]

Obviously the guy is a cad, I'm just having a hard time believing that his reaction took you completely by surprise.
BTW, what will you do if he disappears?
Or, even worse (and this might sound insane), but be careful - make sure he's not planning an accident, or disapearance, for you.

he said it was my fault and that it should be in my purse not in our luggage. :) simple as that

I meant did you ask him:"What if I get pregnant?"
f stop   
8 Dec 2012
Love / Aliments and abortion (I was married to a Polish guy) [64]

regardless of her intentions

Obviously, in her relationship, the responsibility of contraception was delegated to her. That is perfectly acceptable in a trusting relationship.
So, when they were having unsafe sex, what did she think his reaction would be to an unplanned pregnancy? Did she ask him?
I would have known, that's all I'm saying. For example, some men assume, or are assured, that a woman will "take care of it" in the event she gets pregnant. Most women will say that they were sure that he'll just love the baby once it's here. And there are those that want a baby, assume that even if he does not want it, baby and a steady income is a win-win. I'm not considering those that are not asking for financial help because that is obviously not her.

Now, all that said, I assure you that if I was talking to him, my questions would be completely different.. but all we have is her.
f stop   
8 Dec 2012
Love / Aliments and abortion (I was married to a Polish guy) [64]

not in the way I think you're suggesting

I tried not to suggest anything, but you're right. I tend to consider what might the other, unrepresented side of the coin look like. Plus, when we tell our story here, we always make ourselves look good and will not admit to our own wrong doings, a lot of times just because we consider someone else's wrong doing more grievous and pertinent.

But in the absence of the "other side", we are free to imagine: .. a man, so deeply in love with his Asian girlfriend that he marries her, then, at the joyous news of a pregnancy, unexpectedly turns onto complete Mr. Hide and banishes his love, and the unborn child, penniless, into the street. The woman, otherwise intelligent and perceptive, is completely taken by surprise by this side of him that she has never seen, didn't even know he was not a pro-lifer!

Could be.
f stop   
6 Dec 2012
USA, Canada / What US National Parks are worth visiting most? [11]

in no particular order:

New York - two extremes: Manhattan and Montauk beaches
Miami - Calle Ocho and SOBE Art Deco district
Pacific Coast Hwy - I didn't pay too much attention to the map during that drive, but it had some breathtaking vistas
Colorado, Rockies, etc
Grand Canyon, Sedona etc
Vermont in the fall
f stop   
6 Dec 2012
History / History and old pictures from Nowa Huta [11]

there are many more at this link under the last picture:
Nowa Huta na archiwalnych zdjęciach

english.nh.pl/architecture.htm

What shape are those old buildings in?
f stop   
4 Dec 2012
News / Are Poles good enough for USA (to go there without a visa)? [288]

How does the following list of countries that enjoy visa waiver fit into you racist theory, call1in?
Hungary, Iceland, Norway, Austria, Ireland,Belgium, Czech Republic, Latvia, Slovakia, Denmark, Liechtenstein, Slovenia, Estonia, Lithuania, Finland, France, Sweden, Germany, Monaco, Switzerland, Netherlands, United Kingdom
f stop   
1 Dec 2012
News / UN threatens ''Poland's windows of life" [24]

In US an unwanted child can be left at any fire station. Instead of alarms and flashing light though, a Newborn Safety Act allows for gathering some health information from the parent while guaranteeing to protect their anonymity.
f stop   
30 Nov 2012
Language / Addressing a widow who lives in Poland [12]

Good manners?!?
Even if the husband was alive, you should not use her husband's first name when addressing her. She has her own first name, for Christsakes!

When addressing both, use, for example "Mr and Mrs Joseph and Cheryl Novak"