I have a serious question... i want to pop that one ;) Seriously i want to ask my woman for her hand in marriage but dont know whether to ask her parents for permission first...
Im from england and she is from poland and i live in poland... any advise would be appreciated
I'm against! If you marry a women, you should be prepared to marry her no matter what. That shows responsibility. To ask her dad first, is maybe nice for him, but to your love you say (implicit): I want to marry you honey, but only if somebody else (daddy) agrees with it.
If a child becomes a grown up, it should not be held under permission of his/her parents (unless its mental-challenged he he :P)!
Sounds like you want to do the right thing but those days have past I think.
Best advice would be to ask her first and then ask her advice (provided she say's yes) if you should as her father. If she says yes, then ask him . He does need to know he wasn't first.
Either way, don't forget to put on the forum what her answer is !!
I know what you mean its old fashioned and yes it should be all about her but somewhere inside feels i should ask them first...
i just dont know if its polish custom... my mate from poland told me "fuck it" its her you marrying and "ye, i agree... but still, i just want everything to be perfect :)
If I'm the one that gets landed with a bill for my daughter's wedding. Then it would be nice if the groom at least thought about the rules of etiquette.
LOL... this is what is confusing me, some things have changed and some things havent.... i no i want to pay for everything im not waiting for her dad to dish the dough.. i can handle myself and i dont expect him to.... but at the same time i feel i should ask fist.
im confused with all these rules and traditions : /
the tradition: ask her parents for permission, then ask the girl and let her dad pay for everything... your way might be: talk to the girl and ask her, ask her parents for blessings and pay for your own wedding....
but dont know whether to ask her parents for permission first...
Ask her first, then (If she says yes...) tell her to not tell the parents yey, go and ask the parents... If you really ask the parents first, then you may hear yes from mom and dad and big f. off from her.
all i no is i want her forever... i just want her to be happy, but its hard for me to ask her would you like me to ask you parents first before i ask you to marry me
I asked my (now wife) first and then when we soon after travelled to Poland i kinda formally asked for her mums (dad has passed) permission in front of all the family. Everyone knew we were engaged already but i was told it was just part of the tradition and herself really appreciated it. That said it was a bit embarassing trying to be all sweet and stuff, then waiting for her brother to translate )
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