we think she is just trying to scam us.
Certainly sounds like it.
I told the landlord that the screws and coating was to be found on top of the dresser right next to it.
In fairness, you should have put it back as it was before you distmantled it. You're responsible for leaving a place in the condition it was when you moved in. It's up to her if she wants to replace it. Get a price for a similar one.
The broken lamp is broken, yes that is our fault
You're only obliged to replace it with one of similar value. Check out the price of a similar one.
during our first month of renting
Did you inform the landlord at the time? If not, then for future reference it's best to let the landlord know immediately in writing so that you can sort it out at the time and avoid this kind of confusion in the future. She can claim that as you continued to use it in a broken state, it's now damaged beyond repair.Maybe the bed is repairable and maybe not. She's saying 1,100. Ok, so with the other items I've already mentioned, that probably doesn't come to more than 1,500 to 2,000 in total leaving her 3,500 or 4,000 for repainting the two bedrooms..........
For the other matters, tell her in no uncertain terms to get stuffed. Put the things you agree to on paper, talk to her on the phone or in person about the other things and read her the riot act. You have to be very forceful, do a bit of shouting, waving arms etc. It's awful and not the way I'd choose to conduct myself, but I'm afraid that's only thing Polish people respond to in these situations. They will walk all over you otherwise. If you're a guy though, stand well back from her while you're shouting so that you don't appear as if you're physically threatening her! Shout in English if you want to and don't worry about whether she understands. As other posters mentioned, you probably will have to settle for not getting a penny of your deposit back but she won't take things any further. Chalk it up to experience and learn a costly lesson from it.
For future reference, always take photos when you move into a property showing condition of paintwork, furniture etc. Then take more photos when you move out to show the condition you left it in. Do without your posters as they're a b*stard to get off without at least leaving marks on the wall. If you feel you must have them, buy cheap frames in IKEA and lean them against the wall. It looks quite nice and arty :)
Clean the place thoroughly before you go.
Leave everything as you found it. If you've moved furniture around, taken down pictures or curtains, whatever, put it back as it was.