RC annulment procedure in Poland

Hello,

I would like to consult you how RC annulment will work in Poland. I consulted my priest in the States, and he said to me that a decree of civil divorce of my ''existing'' marriage needs to be in place before the church here accepts my petition to start its investigation. So I am looking into a solution in Poland as I don't want to get a civil divorce while in eyes of the church I am still married.

Me and my ''husband'' married in Poland in our early twenties and later he left for other woman and now established their own family with kids born following while legally he is still my husband. He is in Poland, but now I have moved to the States for a couple of years and do plan to stay here for a long-term. I got my official decree of separation from the court in Poland years ago, and now I am considering to have my marriage annulled in order to have a fresh start in my life. I am very afraid of violating my faith of being a Catholic, so my decision on filing a civil divorce would depend on the result of my annulment.

- Does any one know if decree of civil separation enough for me to petition my annulment at the RC church in Poland?

- Since we are not divorced, will it take longer than 2 years to complete the whole process?

I am very welcome to any of your inputs to my situation. But please be non-judgemental.

Dzieki.

I dont think anyone could be, you have your reasons for wanting to do it. I personally think the Church would look favorably on you because it was him who violated the sanctity of marriage and not you.

My suggestion would be to talk to another priest in the States and see what he says...The Roman Catholic Church is the Roman Catholic Church where ever you are, so I dont see why they cant annul the marriage in America.

Good luck.

If you are alone at the moment (not in another relationship) then you are not violating
your Catholic faith. As the things are, he is still your husband even though he left you
for another woman, as far as the Church is concerned you are still married.


No, it's not. There is no such thing as divorce in RC church. There can be
an announcment of marriage being void (as never being valid for many reasons).
But if your marriage was proper, with a church ceremony and consumated then
there is no such thing as "divorce" for that kind of marriage.


Why do you think there should be an annulment of your marriage? Because of your
husbands betrayal? I'm afraid that's not a good enough reason. You have to realise
that if you don't get the annulment and enter into a relationship with another man,
that will mean living in the permanent state of mortal sin, not being able to receive
Holy Communion and generally being on the straight road to hell.

I'm not saying it's right (depends how you look at it), but these are the rules. Sorry.

BTW - your husband is in a worse situation then you, because he broke the Holy
Bond of Marriage. In other words - there is a hope for you, but if he doesn't come
back to you and repent - he's pretty much f*cked (even if he remains alone, but
if you remain alone, you'll be all right, as it is not your fault that he left you).

So, if you were wondering who's closer to hell at the moment - it's your husband.

If you want ur marriage to be annuled there needed to be things which would make the marriage being unlawful in the first place (like if someone forced u to marry him etc). It doesnt matter what happened afterwards and certainly the annulment cant be made coz he left you for another woman.

As torq said in RC there is no divorce, you can get ur marriage annuled only.

Exactly. Also, if the marriage wasn't consumated (because of his impotency for example,
that he hid from you before the marriage) that makes the marriage void.

Since he has kids now, that really isnt an option.

She could always murder him, that way she'd be a widow and be able to marry in church again if she wanted to :D

Theoretically, if she really regretted what she did, had a valid confession and repented
then she would be able to marry in Church again. I never thought of it this way...

Are you a lawyer, Amathyst? :)

God forgives all of his children ;0) And she'd be a merry widow ready to walk down that aisle :D


No but I should charge for my advice - by the sounds of things, its her only chance of marrying in church again!

There are a few grounds for annulment in RC, even if marriage was consumated. Heck, I know people who had 7 kids and got the annulment. Sometimes it's just a question of who you know, other times it's a question of co-operation of the "spouse".

Look it up here
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canonical_impediment#List_of_diriment_impediments_to_marriage

and then contact your favorite priest. A fee will be and "favors" may be involved. Yup, that will really shake your faith to the point of making an RC annulment irrelevant.

That leaves the question about why people need the annulment in the first place if they dont really care about the faith. I mean, if you do everything just to get annulment surely u must know deep inside in ur heart that you are just cheating to get a piece of paper. I dont see any sense in it, tbh...

I can't speak for others, but I can say that faith is one thing, and public perception another. There are lots of people who go to church for the show, for the social aspect, for business etc.

Btw. those questionable annulments are backed by RC priests, so I guess their faith must be a little flimsy too.

Thanks for your informative suggestions. :)

The reason I wanted to get my marriage annuled is that I am not sure if this marriage is valid in this situation. I didn't see my husband for years and I don't feel comfortable to see him again due to the big trauma he left on me. I am not sure whether I will fall in love again with another man but I did turn down a few chances of being loved again over the past few years. On one side I feel I should not live as a widow as everyone has his or her own needs that have to be satisfied; on the other side, I think I should surrender myself to my faith and abandon my ridiculous thoughts of being loved again. It would cause pain if I can't be part of Holy Communion.

The churches both in Poland and the States wanted me to demonstrate that my marraige could not work out anyway before they accept my petition for annulment. So I am thinking about whether my official separation document is enough to be supporting document for this reason? If you know anything about this, please kindly keep me updated.

We were consumated and while we were seeing each other when I was young, I wanted him to be my husband very much, and to be honest, I didn't foresee just a year after our wedding, he started having affairs with different women until he met this one to become stablized. I did try hard to save my marriage for a couple of years before I eventually gave up.

Please offer your insights on how to get my life right again by keeping my faith and my happiness.

I think you should seek help of lawyer (the canon law lawyer, not the civil one). He would be able to help you. They are more knowlegeable about all the tricks than any member of this forum, i can imagine.


Don't be so harsh on yourself. Everyone deserves to be loved, certainly you too deserve it, no matter what a*holes you met earlier in your life.

How old were you when you got married? did your parents want you to get married?

I really would advice you to search professional help and try to sort this out.