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Posts by stepheng  

Joined: 2 May 2007 / Male ♂
Last Post: 13 Jan 2008
Threads: -
Posts: Total: 49 / Live: 15 / Archived: 34
From: UK
Speaks Polish?: Not really
Interests: Music, Films, Women, Socialising

Displayed posts: 15
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stepheng   
30 Oct 2007
History / Kosciuszko Squadron - why don't they bring it back? [45]

again,wtf? My Grandfather flew Hurricanes in the RAF during the Battle of Britain and even he would gladly tell you that the Polish Squadrons accounted for the highest tally against the Hun,shmuck.

This is true. In the early days of the Battle of Britain the RAF was on the defensive heavily as the Luftwaffe was bombing the air bases. They would have won if Hitler hadn't have changed his mind and started focusing on attacking London instead of keeping up the attacks on the RAF's bases...

Britain had plenty of planes which were easy to replace but too few pilots so they sent too many men up there who were really untrained and inexperienced. The Polish pilots were generally better trained and had experience as they had been fighting the Germans already before they joined the RAF's efforts.

At the end of the day Britain joined the war because of Poland and the tragedy was the aftermath of that conflict.
stepheng   
3 Jun 2007
Love / Fell in love with a Polish girl, but find it difficult to approach her [620]

I once tried the online dating thing and it never really worked for me. Hard to find a site worth using that does not charge the earth.

Still there is nothing to lose by going for it and it would take the awkwardness out of meeting as you already know a few things about the person before you walk over to meet and talk to them.
stepheng   
30 May 2007
Love / Fell in love with a Polish girl, but find it difficult to approach her [620]

Well like you I have been a bit doubtful and shy in the past so i know what it is like.

With regard to the Polish woman I was interested in at work (which led me here on a google hit). I was very nervous to speak to her as well and blew it a few times. What totally knocked me was when she approached me and we started talking one day.

I guess I took that as an indicator of interest and a few days later I mustered up the courage to ask for her number and say that I really like her and wanted to meet with her sometime. She told me that she was married and that her phone was not with her so she could not hand me her phone number, she then apologised and said she thought I was sweet for asking.

The thing was like you I felt a lot better having done it, I set myself a goal and I was happy to have reached it.

The fear of doing something is always about ten times worse than actually saying to yourself "screw it, lets go" and actually doing it.
stepheng   
29 May 2007
Love / Fell in love with a Polish girl, but find it difficult to approach her [620]

Cheers, I'm still buzzing about doing it. I probably wouldn't be any happier even if she had said she wasn't in a long term relationship. I've got to kick on from this now and continue in a positive manner.

Big congratulations Ken on accomplishing your goal of making the move. When you challenge yourself to approach and speak it is a victory in itself. In many ways your situation was the same as mine (even with the same outcome). Ok it was not a positive outcome this time but someday it will be if you keep going with confidence.
stepheng   
19 May 2007
Love / Fell in love with a Polish girl, but find it difficult to approach her [620]

Do you realise you ran 7 stop signs whilst your overactive imagination was running out of control sir?

I didn't overrun any stop signs until she told me, and trust me I have been around the game long enough to know them. ;-)

The thing about body language is that it is something we have little conscious control over and in clusters it shows what we desire. Just because someone is in a relationship doesn't mean they stop giving off body language signals either because biology keeps on driving us. Humans are not naturally monogamous creatures, if we were there would be no cheating or relationship breakdowns in the world and things would be a lot simpler.

Personally I always make a move on a girl if I get at least 3 or 4 separate positive body language signals from her and it works well often. Even if I did fail this time it was worth a good shot and that is all that matters.

So I am happy I made the shot and moving on with a smile and some dignity...
stepheng   
18 May 2007
Love / Fell in love with a Polish girl, but find it difficult to approach her [620]

Well playboys & girls I got her number, but on friendly basis cause she says she is seeing someone. I know she likes me cause she was blushing.

Congrats on the number, just make sure it doesn't get you any trouble.

My situation has got a little strange. I know the Polish woman I was interested in likes me, her body language and eye contact has been very intense and she has always gone out of her way to greet me whenever she sees me.

Sadly when I said I wanted to meet with her and asked for her number today despite blushing she said that she was married. (talk about bad luck there)

A shame I guess.
stepheng   
17 May 2007
Love / Fell in love with a Polish girl, but find it difficult to approach her [620]

The girls have given out their numbers whom i show interest but don't really care. but why its get so hard and i even get nervous asking a number of a girl whom i truly like and the fear of rejection kicks in . Thats so f***** up. A Weird psychology. I need a genius mind like Freud to help me on this.

I have no idea why this is but its really annoying psychology when you get tongue-tied like that.

the only thing I can suggest is to give her your phone number and if she really likes you, she'll call you.

Girls are just as nervous and insecure as men.

Maybe so, but women can also get too nervous to call back too. I would say the best solution is to get her number yourself. A good solution without needing to say a lot is to hold out your phone on the "new contact" screen with her name in... She'll get the idea that you want her to put her number in. ;-)
stepheng   
3 May 2007
Love / Fell in love with a Polish girl, but find it difficult to approach her [620]

Confidence is a curious thing don't you think? I see people every day that I know in my heart of hearts I'm every bit as good as but the thing that separates us is confidence. But how do you gain it? Is it something your born with? I'm studying psychology and I really find this kind of stuff fascinating. Its really intense.

Confidence can be built up in someone if they are willing to change their ways. Even confident people have the same emotions running through their mind when approaching.

I heard from a friend that one such technique is to stand in a busy shopping centre and smile and say hello to passers by and to try to approach within 3 seconds of seeing someone so as to limit emotional resistance. I still need to try it myself as I was only told about it today.