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Best way to find a Polish husband...ideas?


OP PolkaTagAlong 10 | 186
26 Jul 2012 #91
I've been witness to that scenario. After a doctor's business is established, he eventually becomes married to his job.

Exactly, its sickening, I want someone with a life. A man who has a lot of good friends and who is kind of his own boss is perfect. I don't like the idea of marrying someone with a constricting job, it's just not right for me.

Depending on the individual, a Polish gentleman from the "Fatherland" may be up your alley too.

What do you mean by that? I've met some German-Americans, and they can be quite the cold fish. They are often very reserved and dispassionate. Not my cup of tea at all.
4 eigner 2 | 831
26 Jul 2012 #92
I've met some German-Americans, and they can be quite the cold fish. They are often very reserved and dispassionate

You find all kinds of people in every nation. As long as you'll continue to generalize, you'll have a serious problem with finding your Mr.Right or anyone at all for that matter.
OP PolkaTagAlong 10 | 186
26 Jul 2012 #93
Hey, anyone that comes along is new to me and I don't judge them by what they are, its just that I like a really warm loving person, and German and many other Northern Europeans can hardly ever be. There are some of those people around here and I've known them to be reserved and cold/fishy. The medical school guy I dated was half German and he showed no passion in anything he was so apathetic and boring. He basically dumped me because he was worried about genetic diseases that old people in my family died from. Now, that is shallow, cold/fishy and just plain weird. I was so disturbed that I didn't know this about him when I finally found out later after he'd been having a few beers. He had made up his mind I guess after he ate dinner at my house and inquired about how some of my relatives/grandparents they were talking about had died. My dad said he seemed to really really want to know how they died.
jasondmzk
26 Jul 2012 #94
I was so disturbed that I didn't know this about him when I finally found out later after he'd been having a few beers.

Yeah, no, but see, if he was holding out on you because he was a kraut, having a few beers wouldn't have cracked him. I think you're certainly entitled to have your own tastes and preferences in fellas, but people are taking exception with how you're correlating race with behavior and appearance and painting both with such a broad brush.
OP PolkaTagAlong 10 | 186
26 Jul 2012 #95
Well, the beers were very strong draft beers and they say alcohol is like a truth serum. I asked him to answer a question honestly and does he really feel serious about me and he said to be honest, no I wouldn't marry you because I'm worried about your health. After I prodded him some more he went on to say because so many people in my family are overweight, he's worried about me and he's a little worried about the genetic disease history. The only reason he didn't leave out the door was he wanted to pretend like he was serious so I would give him free sex. I remember when there was a point where everything kind of changed and I was getting a weird vibe.

I'm merely exagerrating everything about racial stereotypes because I'm on an anonymous internet forum and I don't have to articulate what I'm thinking very clearly.
jasondmzk
26 Jul 2012 #96
After I prodded him some more he went on to say because so many people in my family are overweight, he's worried about me and he's a little worried about the genetic disease history

Wowzers. And this was the first time he'd been such a gem? It's hard to believe he could mask such overt douchebaggery. Some people are better when they're being cold and detached, rather than "drunk and in the mood to share". And you know what's worse? He probably wasn't even worried about YOU, he was worried about all the fat kids you might give him. Maybe you oughta just try one of those Match.com dealies, no? I mean, the couples in the tv commercials look super-cute. It has to work for SOMEBODY.
phtoa 9 | 236
26 Jul 2012 #97
It really sounds to me like your over thinking this whole serious relationship thing!

You said your 25 or younger, why is it already so necessary for you to find the one?
For many this is a long and hard travel throughout life for many to find this one person, and believe me, many gets abused during that travel men as well as women!

I don't understand all of the standards/limitations you make in the threads, regarding to which men you want to be serious with? Every guy form every country is different, you can't go stereotype German/North Europeans as insensitive based on one or a few bad experiences.

Why limit yourself with these requirement? IMO you never know who you are going to fall in love with, and to be honest I think 70% of people on earth (self calculated :-) got married to someone who was not their type, but instead became their type because they earned it, by showing her respect and honesty and proving that they are good people!

Stop trying so hard, you'll get to exactly where you need to be it's just a matter of time.
pam
26 Jul 2012 #98
its just that I like a really warm loving person, and German and many other Northern Europeans can hardly ever be.

Seriously, what planet are you on? Talk about a sweeping statement....
You are so fussy you will be lucky to find anyone.
Based on skin colour alone you have already ruled out Africa /Asia/India/South America.
Now Northern Europeans are under fire.
You should seriously consider internet dating. That way you can be as selective as you like.
Puzzie 1 | 53
26 Jul 2012 #99
You should seriously consider internet dating

Isn't she on the internet?

You are so fussy

What's wrong about being fussy? She wants to get the real goods instead of trash in a nice wrap. She is dead right and wise about it.

Also, she has the right to have any skin colour preference she pleases, or, in truth, any at all preference she pleases.
pam
26 Jul 2012 #100
Nothing wrong with being fussy, but she's taking it to a whole new level. It's not just a question of colour/race, she also wants someone that doesn't have a job that is " too constricting ".

What next? oops! I forgot, they have to be tall as well!

I get the impression that whoever she meets is going to fall short of her standards, and by not compomising a bit, she could be missing out on meeting some nice guys.

Oh, and the uk is also classified as being part of Northern Europe. I daresay she will reject having an English boyfriend on the grounds of us Brits being " cold and reserved, with a stiff upper lip " Lolzzz.......
Puzzie 1 | 53
26 Jul 2012 #101
Nothing wrong with being fussy,

Hahah, she is a bit arrogant too, but it's all right. What I like about her is that she is herself; she is honest and not falsely humble about her seemingly impossibly high standards. And she's got genuine grounds for being a princess because she's good-looking and smart, oops, intelligent.

Way to go, Polka, I'd say.
:)
p3undone 8 | 1,132
26 Jul 2012 #102
Puzzie,I do respect the fact that she is honest about her views;though I may not agree with some of them.
Puzzie 1 | 53
26 Jul 2012 #103
And I respect that you respect she's honest about her views and that you may disagree with some of them.

:)
teflcat 5 | 1,032
26 Jul 2012 #104
I daresay she will reject having an English boyfriend on the grounds of us Brits being " cold and reserved, with a stiff upper lip "

...furled umbrella and bowler hat. Fog. Bad teeth, of course.
4 eigner 2 | 831
26 Jul 2012 #105
its just that I like a really warm loving person, and German and many other Northern Europeans can hardly ever be

Wrong. I guess, you haven't met many of them so far. Your statement is pretty typical in Poland so I don't blame you for thinking that way.
Puzzie 1 | 53
26 Jul 2012 #106
Your statement is pretty typical in Poland

Do you mean PolkaTagAlong resides in Poland?
OP PolkaTagAlong 10 | 186
26 Jul 2012 #107
Maybe you oughta just try one of those Match dearies, no? I mean, the couples in the tv commercials look super-cute. It has to work for SOMEBODY.

I don't think he's worried about having fat kids lol (actually none of the kids in our family were fat at all). He's not the type of person who wants kids, but he's pressured by his older parents (had him in their forties) and me because I asked him that up front if he would want to have kids someday with his wife. I told him that I want a large family, about 3-5 and he said he might go for two. I also know for sure that he's weird about genetic diseases, but the funny thing is, he's got a bad rheumatism gene in his family that if it's on a certain generation, every woman in the family will have it. He has a mother with "fibromyalgia" so he's used to a lot of sick people melodramatic whining and it disgusts him, so I guess he's super phobic about having a sick wife, but still that is just retarded and nutty. Someone who is "genetically pure" might reject him for the same reason lol jk. Such a thing doesn't exist, because 90% of people have genetic high risk for at least a few things when they get old, I don't know how he's going to find a girl that will tolerate his robotic, cold fish attitude and meet his picky standards.

I can gurantee you he was worried about having a fat, unattractive woman someday, he doesn't care about kids. He "studied" the picture of my sister, who is not a thin woman and wouldn't respond when I talked about her. I guess he was worried I would look like her someday when I'm older and I've had kids. What a horrible person.
beckski 12 | 1,617
26 Jul 2012 #108
What do you mean by that? I've met some German-Americans, and they can be quite the cold fish

I find that there may be characteristic differences, between Polish-American and Polish men. Some positive, some negative differences in culture, values, etc.
OP PolkaTagAlong 10 | 186
26 Jul 2012 #109
Oh, I thought when you said "the fatherland" you meant Germany.
NorthMancPolak 4 | 646
26 Jul 2012 #110
I never said I consider myself "Polish"

That's why I wrote "Polish", not Polish.

I'm not going to turn this into a Pol-Am bashing exercise, but I'm sure that several of our long-term European PF posters are thinking what I'm thinking :p

Exactly, its sickening, I want someone with a life. A man who has a lot of good friends and who is kind of his own boss is perfect. I don't like the idea of marrying someone with a constricting job, it's just not right for me.

This seems to be a common trait amongst your age group over here. Why date/marry someone who wants a respected career, when you can date the local drug dealer who can pick and choose his hours, yet earns more? I've been a victim of this myself, and it's pretty sad. I really despair for the future. It's hardly surprising that Asia is booming and the West is falling apart at the seams, with attitudes like yours. If medicine was such a lowly and constricting job, it wouldn't be so over-subscribed, and there wouldn't be so many married doctors.

Oh, the irony! You of all people, complaining about a guy being picky??? lol, that's the best laugh I've had all day!! :D

Now, let's consider your long list of unattainable standards for a moment. I'm sure I'm not the only one on here who feels that, were the roles to be reversed, you would definitely reject him if he had relatives with a history of genetic illnesses!

It's your choice, of course; but it's not as if you're even half as hot as my soon-to-be wife was at your age - and she married a career-orientated loser like me! There's a moral in there somewhere. hehe ;)
4 eigner 2 | 831
27 Jul 2012 #111
Do you mean PolkaTagAlong resides in Poland?

No, I mean she's Polish in the US.
OP PolkaTagAlong 10 | 186
27 Jul 2012 #112
but it's not as if you're even half as hot as my soon-to-be wife was at your age - and she married a career-orientated loser like me! There's a moral in there somewhere. hehe ;)

I don't mean being career oriented is a loser lol, I just don't think doctors and scientists are my type. Hotness is subjective ;)

you would definitely reject him if he had relatives with a history of genetic illnesses!

Actually, his relatives were talking about his family, and he does! I never thought anything of it or cared. He's in for a suprise if he thinks he can carefully plan out his life so that he doesn't have to deal with anything difficult. He's a nietzschan, he thinks that because he's smart, all of this mistakes can be absolved and he can have everything perfect and exactly the way he wants it. He has no feelings.

I am not as picky as you think I am. I would go on a date with a man who was a little short or not really my type, but I know honestly it probably won't go anywhere. Many people are MUCH pickier.
Patrycja19 62 | 2,688
27 Jul 2012 #113
polka, all they are saying is just stop trying to picture this guy or make him into a calender man.

its ok to have dreams, but let someone share that with you, let the woman out and shove the little girl in the closet!!

so to speak.. come out of your shell, it might be you pushing it all away. least thats what I am seeing.

* you built a shell over you and you wont bust out till the perfect man comes along*

crack that egg hot momma and go find you a hunka hunka burning love!! lol
jasondmzk
27 Jul 2012 #114
crack that egg hot momma and go find you a hunka hunka burning love!

If that isn't a book title, it should be.
OP PolkaTagAlong 10 | 186
27 Jul 2012 #115
crack that egg hot momma and go find you a hunka hunka burning love!! lol

ha ha ha
pawian 221 | 23,982
29 Jul 2012 #116
I want someone who is sane to the core, responsible/moral, classy, tall, white, and has his life on track but not overly religious.

I fullfil these requirements and have even a few extra ones, but I cannot help you as I have been married for over dozen years and not gonna change it.

I am terribly sorry.
OP PolkaTagAlong 10 | 186
30 Jul 2012 #117
That's ok, I'm looking for someone who is about 25. I forgot to add soul to the mix. You could get a good idea from listening to the song, Ain't No Other Man hehe.
Jimmu 2 | 156
31 Jul 2012 #118
Best way to find a husband
Where did you lose him?
pawian 221 | 23,982
31 Jul 2012 #119
That's ok, I'm looking for someone who is about 25.

Come on, age doesn`t matter.
You shouldn`t be so fastidious. :):):):)
OP PolkaTagAlong 10 | 186
3 Aug 2012 #120
You shouldn`t be so fastidious. :):):):)

Oh come on, I just don't want to live with someone who wants to come home from work and lay on the couch every day within the next 10 years.


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