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Posts by mafketis  

Joined: 31 Mar 2008 / Male ♂
Warnings: 2 - AO
Last Post: 29 Mar 2024
Threads: Total: 36 / In This Archive: 1
Posts: Total: 10,704 / In This Archive: 501
From: tez nie
Speaks Polish?: tak
Interests: tez nie

Displayed posts: 502 / page 7 of 17
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mafketis   
10 Dec 2008
Life / Are Polish People Hypochondriacs? [50]

An L4 is a form from a doctor legally freeing you from any work (during which time your employer still has to pay you and is legally prevented from firing you)

Traditionally not to hard to get, often for vague or nebulous reasons.

Basically, getting sick is a canny life strategy for many Polish people as many, many different kinds of problems can be solved (or at least postponed) by a lapse in health and long recuperation.
mafketis   
11 Dec 2008
Love / Polish Girlfriend gone missing [154]

Well assuming that he finds his girlfriend and she wants to continue the relationship it would make more sense (for all concerned) for him to try to win the rest of the family over (the father may be a lost cause he might just be overprotective or his buttons might be easily pushed).

Learning some Polish and learning how to behave in Poland (that is making some effort to conform to local norms when he's in Poland rather than the usually disastrous tactic of 'just be yourself') if and when he meets them will go a long way to convincing them that he's serious and worthwhile.
mafketis   
11 Dec 2008
Love / Polish Girlfriend gone missing [154]

Looking at it now it was really obvious and I should never have come. But hey, love blinds you at times.

Based on what you wrote, you weren't blinded, you were in a coma.

To ted-70: Two weeks recuperation doesn't sound at all excessive to me (by Polish standards ) and I'd go further. I wouldn't be surprised if she doesn't go back to the unversity until January.

Not much happens at the university just before Christmas and I can easily imagine a Polish student (even one with with a not-great home situation) not wanting to make the commute to Cracow for just a week of classes (I know from experience most students will skip the 21st and 22nd) and then try to beat the travelling hordes closer to the holiday.

So I'd put off serious searching until classes start back up in January.

But ... if you haven't heard anything by then, make sure you're available on New Year's Eve. She'll probably go to a party at friends then and that might be the best time for her to try to make contact. You don't want to miss a call because your phone's turned off or you can't hear it.
mafketis   
11 Dec 2008
Love / Polish Girlfriend gone missing [154]

The keeping in touch thing is less Polish than just human gravity which works in strange ways. I remember a friend who saw her Warsaw friends more frequently when she lived in Krakow, when she moved to Warsaw she hardly saw them at all.

There are also individual differences, I tend to have hermit inclinations and Polish friends have complained that I don't make enough effort to keep in touch (and I usually think I have to have some special news to make contact, which is dumb, but ....)

By time working differently I meant that while anglo-saxon time flows on pretty evenly, but time is irregular in Poland, long stretches of nothing happening and then a lot of activity crammed into a short period (kind of like a bus stop where you wait for 20 minutes and then three buses show up at the same time).

And services of various kinds can just sort of stop for shorter or longer periods of time and people either work around it or put whatever it is on hold.
mafketis   
11 Dec 2008
Love / Polish Girlfriend gone missing [154]

I think her parents thought it would'nt last - there were some pretty bizarre comments about me being not only a foreigner but a protestant of all things (I'm not even a regular church goer!).

Are they?

I still say that your long term goal should be to neutralize the hostility (if not win them over). Learn some Polish, learn how to behave if and when you're introduced etc

Also, when you find out something (for good or ill) you need to post it here, we will want closure on this thing too.
mafketis   
11 Dec 2008
News / EU PRO-HOMO INTERFERENCE PROTESTED [19]

Two homos shacking up together are not a family.

from Wikipedia: pl.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jerzy_Waldorff

(my translation)

"Jerzy Waldorff was gay. In his autobiography "The dance of life with death" he wrote that that was the reason his father disowned him. His life partner was the dancer Mieczysław Jankowski, with whom he spent the last 60 years of his life, beginning in 1939 and who toward the end of his (Waldorff's) life cared for him and (their) home. The pair tried to hide their union avoiding appearing in public together and in interviews Waldorff presented Jankowski as a cousin."

But to Polonius 3, Waldorff was just a homo shacking up with another.
mafketis   
11 Dec 2008
News / EU PRO-HOMO INTERFERENCE PROTESTED [19]

I call Godwin for your Hitler-bomb.

a family is a procreative union of a man and woman

If this were true, then infertile heterosexual couples would not be allowed to marry and fertility tests would be a precondition of marriage. After all, an infertile couple bumping nasties (sodomy I guess by your definition) does not meet your definition of family.

Actually maybe you've explained one of the reasons that there are so many visibly pregnant brides in Poland - the priests are requiring proof of fecundity before couples can get married.

If I were an orphan I'd rather be adopted by a loving gay couple than live in an orphanage.

As for your statistics, some citations would be helpful.
mafketis   
11 Dec 2008
News / EU PRO-HOMO INTERFERENCE PROTESTED [19]

Yeah the statistics for sexual abusers among priests is way higher than the among the general population.

Does this mean people should stop going to church?
mafketis   
12 Dec 2008
News / EU PRO-HOMO INTERFERENCE PROTESTED [19]

Polonius, it wouldn't be hard to show truly awful statistics for being Polish vs veing German where

Poles have higher rates of alcoholism
Poles have higher rates of crime (Pole on Pole _and_ Pole on German)
Poles have higher rates of corruption in public institutions than Germans
Poles have lower life expectancy rates than Germans
Poles have a lower literacy rate than Germans
Poles have higher unemployment than Germans
Poles have lower income than Germans (and a higher percentage living in poverty)

So the obvious conclusion is that Poles should try to become German?

Even if I accepted your statistics at face value (which I don't) none of them are reasons in and of themselves for not allowing same sex marriage.

Actually since married heterosexuals tend to live longer than never marrieds, you can make a good case that health policy demands same sex marriage.
mafketis   
14 Dec 2008
Love / polish boyfriend has wrecked my english [48]

He arrived only knowing how to say hello but after one year he could already speak fluent english. The only problem is the sentence structures. i go to the shops becomes i be go to the shop...

"I be go to the shop" is not fluent English (of any kind I can think of).
mafketis   
16 Dec 2008
Love / Polish girlfriend and birth control! [62]

First, "pulling out" is not a good method of birth control. Enough sperm are released before ejaculation that your girlfriend could easily get pregnant.

Second, part of the social bargain in Poland (for a looooong time now) has been that couples that have sex before marriage are expected get married if she gets pregnant (note high percentage of big bellied brides).

If you're serious about birth control, bag your business and tell her why. If you're old enough to be having regular sex you're old enough to talk about the potential consequences.
mafketis   
17 Dec 2008
Love / Polish Girlfriend gone missing [154]

Welcome to Dumpsville, population: ted_no7

Sorry if that's harsh, but this is new info (or I missed it before) and it _really_ sounds like she's decided to end the relationship and didn't have the guts or backbone to tell you directly (and the hospital stuff is just a cover).

I'm coming over to shewolf's point of view: sick or not, father or not, if she cared for you, she'd find a way to let you know (unless there are other details besides the message from the sister who may have been acting on her own).

Finally, in the US (or UK usually) a person who has to choose between a romantic relationship and their family will usually choose the relationship.

In Poland, even if they speak badly of them, they'll usually choose their family.
mafketis   
17 Dec 2008
Love / Polish Girlfriend gone missing [154]

Extreme? Yeah, and I realize it might not be entirely her idea, but ask yourself, in her place would or wouldn't you find a way to contact someone you really loved?

Apparently people ted_no7's contacted know what's going on won't tell him (probably at her request). Can you name that tune?
mafketis   
18 Dec 2008
Love / polish boyfriend has wrecked my english [48]

(A) day when (the) articles vanish from English would be (a) big joy for (the) Poles, at least for me.

English would disintegrate without articles.
There is so much homophony in English that articles are needed for native speakers to parse sentences. I once had to read a five or six page article with almost no articles and it was almost impossible, real agony.

I always way, when in doubt use an article, the wrong article (or an article when none is needed) is easier for native speakers to deal with in writing or speech than the lack of an article when one is needed.
mafketis   
18 Dec 2008
Language / IS "MY Z BRATEM" OK FOR "MY BROTHER AND I"? [28]

I've never heard "my z bratem" though I have heard "ja z bratem"

I have the idea that "(mój) brat i ja" is pretty common too (more often without the unnecessary 'mój')

With verbs "Z bratem rozmawialismy" seems far more common than "rozmawiałem z bratem" (which makes the conversation sound one-sided).
mafketis   
18 Dec 2008
Language / IS "MY Z BRATEM" OK FOR "MY BROTHER AND I"? [28]

Time for the linguist to weigh in.

In (Standard American) English.

Me and my brother went to the movies.
My brother and I went to the movies.

are both fine. The first is considerably more informal than the second (I wouldn't use the first in a job interview but I'd use it with co-workers once I have the job).

My brother and me went to the movies.
I and my brother went to the movies.

are both odd (I think the first is more acceptable than the second which sounds very unnatural though it might be okay somewhere or other).

They talked to me and my brother.
They talked to my brother and me.

Both fine, the second maybe a little more formal but not much.

They talked to my brother and I.

I wouldn't say this and I don't like it, but it's okay in informal conversation. Again avoid in job interviews or any other context where you're speaking with someone more important than you.

They talked to I and my brother.

Ack! wrong! Can't imagine anyone using this under any circumstance.
mafketis   
18 Dec 2008
Language / IS "MY Z BRATEM" OK FOR "MY BROTHER AND I"? [28]

krakow1,

The rule in traditional grammar is that the form should be "to my brother and me" because you use 'me' after a preposition (to).

To decide whether to use "me" or "I" in expressions that use 'and' drop everything but I/me and it will be clear.

They talked to (my brother and) me.

(Surely you wouldn't say: They talked to I.)

(My brother and) I went to the movies.

But usage is changing now. What seems to be happening is a switch from the old rule (as detailed above) to a new rule:

use 'me' before 'and'
use 'I' after 'and'.

Actual usage for many people is a combination of the old rule and the new rule.

Someone is talking to you and me. (I'm nopw not so sure this one is correct but it probably should be)

yes, subject of an adjective.

1. Adjectives don't have subjects in English.
2. There is no adjective in the sentence "Someone is talking to you and me."
mafketis   
18 Dec 2008
Language / IS "MY Z BRATEM" OK FOR "MY BROTHER AND I"? [28]

"He's a gay." is perfectly grammatical, it's just not idiomatic, like saying "on jest homoseksualny" in Polish (again grammatical but not idiomatic).

Interestingly "he's a gay" but not *"she's a gay" but "she's gay" is fine.

Basically more often than not Polish likes to describe people with nouns when English prefers adjectives "Jestem Polakiem" or "Jestem Polką" vs "I'm Polish".

Dinner is different and I'm not thinking clearly enough right now to explain it (I think there's a name for that kind of article-less noun but it escapes me).

unavailable for comment:

dafffyd

I was going to post this seprately with a quote but the stoooopid double positng rules prevented that.
mafketis   
19 Dec 2008
Love / Was I wrong or is it just my polish gf [26]

Like most men, you have no idea what is going on when it comes to women and completely miss the signals they give each other and the tactics they use.

Your girlfriend, on the other hand, is Polish and recognizes what the other Polish girl is up to. Yes, becoming 'friends' as a way to move in on another woman's guy is nothing new or different in Poland. Usually the guy has no idea of what's going on until he's been dumped by his original girlfriend or cheating on her with the new girl who doesn't respect him (since he was so easy to manipulate) and will also dump him in due time.

The choice is up to you:

1. Continue talking about your GF to this 'friend'.

2. Respect your current girlfriend and find reasons to not talk to this 'friend'.
mafketis   
19 Dec 2008
Language / IS "MY Z BRATEM" OK FOR "MY BROTHER AND I"? [28]

However, this does not change the fact that that my friend and I will meet, as usual on Friday.

Yes, that is the traditional correct form, but

"They'll meet my friend and I" isn't.
mafketis   
19 Dec 2008
Language / IS "MY Z BRATEM" OK FOR "MY BROTHER AND I"? [28]

benszymanski,

I only mentioned the traditional rules to bury them (for a linguist 'correct' means 'consistently used spontaneously by native speakers', for traditional grammarians 'correct' means 'a rule written in a book'.)

Most of the time in everyday speech, Americans say:

I went to the movies.

and

Me and my brother went to the movies.

if they're being extra formal, maybe

My brother and I went to the movies.

They don't say

My brother and me went to the movies.

or

I and my brother went to the movies.

The rules need to be written out of the facts of usage.
mafketis   
20 Dec 2008
Food / Polish Cake for Christmas [30]

A lot of Polish cakes are wonderful, but I have to say that makowiec doesn't really do it for me.

I even like poppy seeds (mixed into the dough in other cakes) but I don't much care for the thick mass used in makowiec which is almost always too dry (most sernik too). A friend's mother makes what I can tell is excellent makowiec but one small piece is enough for a long time.
mafketis   
21 Dec 2008
Food / Polish Cake for Christmas [30]

mafketis: which is almost always too dry (most sernik too).

this only means they (makowiec and sernik) are quite old (or badly made).

No. Even sernik and makowiec that Polish people think is fresh, very well made and moist enough is on the dry side for me.

And strong coffee doesn't help (me) either. I think you either grow up eating makowiec in which case you like it or you don't in which case you mostly ... don't. It's just not a taste that's easy to acquire as an adult (most non-Poles agree with me IME).
mafketis   
23 Dec 2008
Language / Polish Conditionals (okresy warunkowe or zdania warunkowe) [23]

there is no difference between 2nd and 3rd conditionals in Polish?

There is a single conditional in normal Polish usage.

Gdydym miał pieniądze pojechałbym do Hiszpanii.

=
If I had the money, I'd go to Spain.
and
If I'd had the money, I would have gone to Spain.

There used to be another

Gdybym był miał (??) "If I had had..."

but I don't think it was ever widely used and is very much out of usage now (I don't think I've ever heard or seen it, it's even deader than the pluperfect which I've heard a time or two from old fashioned literary types.