Posts by wedzidlo

wedzidlo

26 Nov 2006

Love / Are you in a Polish-nonPolish relationship? [150]

hello. i just noticed this thread. i've been dating a polish guy who speaks very little english for two months. i don't speak any polish aside from a few phrases i've picked up. at first, dating him was very easy. the communication barrier wasn't much of an issue. but i find it is becoming more frustrating as there are things i'd like to talk to him about, and i'm unable to. i think we had a major miscommunication last week, i think i may have inadvertently hurt his feelings or his pride, and i think he's acting slightly differently towards me now. what is frustrating is that we don't have the language skills to discuss it. so i really have no idea what is going on. i'm wondering how other people who have been in relationships with a language barrier deal with communication problems? i'm worried that if i try to discuss it, it might become worse. i suppose i should just ride it out and see what happens, but i liked the way he was treating me better before.

wedzidlo

26 Nov 2006

Love / Are you in a Polish-nonPolish relationship? [150]

You will need to start learning Polish and he english. You can teach each other.
What you can do, is write him a letter in english, that you feel you hurt his feelings, but don't know how, and you are sorry for that, but you would never do that, because you really care for him, and we can translate it here for you.

thanks krysia! i will see him tonight. i'll try to get a handle on what's going on. it's really just a bunch of little things. none of them by themselves would mean anything, but all together, he has been acting different. but he's also been having trouble at work; he had a hard week. a male friend of mine suggested that maybe my guy just feels comfortable in the relationship and is getting a bit lazy, and that might be what i'm seeing. it very well could have nothing to do with the language barrier, and just to do with him, or me and him!

thank you so much for the translation offer! although i hope it won't come to that, it's very nice to know i could get help if i need it. he is taking english classes, but only started in september. and i'm doing my best to learn what polish i can, but it seems so difficult for me! the community college here might have an intro to polish class in the fall--they do offer a continuing ed class in the winter, but i can't attend because of a schedule conflict! i'm trying to find out if the local polish churches offer anything (someone from this forum suggested that actually :) ).

wedzidlo

4 Dec 2006

Life / Polish Car & Driver magazine? [12]

hi everyone! i am trying to think of ideas for christmas gifts for my polish boyfriend. we've only been dating a few months, and since he only speaks a little english, and i don't speak polish, i'm struggling with gift ideas.

he is a car enthusiast, so one of my ideas was to try find out if there is a polish 'car & driver' magazine or something similar that i could subscribe to and arrange to have sent to him here (in the US) via air mail. are there such magazines in poland? if so, does anyone know what they are called so i could search for them online? do you think i'd be able to have them sent here? thank you for your help and suggestions! :)

wedzidlo

4 Dec 2006

Life / Polish Car & Driver magazine? [12]

hrm. okay, well, i live in CT, but i am only about an hour from nyc, and would be more than happy to make the trip. i'm looking more for a subscription to this magazine tho. thanks for the info, i'll do some googling for nyc. :)

wedzidlo

4 Dec 2006

Life / Polish Car & Driver magazine? [12]

Motor i sport and MAXI tuning are both PL magazines

thanks! that helps alot. it looks like auto motor i sport is exactly what i was searching for. i found their website. thanks. :) i'll have one of my polish friends look it over to see if i could do an international subscription.

wedzidlo

5 Dec 2006

Life / Polish Car & Driver magazine? [12]

thanks krysia, i'll check that one out too! :)

wedzidlo

20 Jan 2007

Life / Do Poles celebrate Valentines day? [29]

Jan 20, 07 [12:55] - Attached on merging:
Valentine's Day in Poland

hi. i was wondering if valentine's day is celebrated in poland? and if so, are the customs the same as the US or are there are any differences? i'll be having my first valentine's day with my polish sweetie and i'm just trying to figure out what to expect. :)

wedzidlo

17 Feb 2007

USA, Canada / letter of invitation to the US? [8]

hello everyone,

my polish boyfriend's sister and her boyfriend would like to visit us in the US. my boyfriend is telling me i need to extend an invitation to his sister's boyfriend so he can visit. i've never heard of this, and i was just doing some checking online and it seems like a letter of invitation is not needed and doesn't help. has anyone ever heard of this? or have any info about the situation? this is where i was looking:

warsaw.usembassy.gov/poland/q3_2005.html

unitedstatesvisas.gov/visiting.html

thanks for any help or insight!

wedzidlo

17 Feb 2007

USA, Canada / letter of invitation to the US? [8]

i would have to since i'm a citizen. i spoke to my polish teacher about this today and she told me the letter is a good idea. from what i'm reading it doesn't help at all, but i suppose it can't hurt for me to write it.

wedzidlo

28 Jun 2007

Love / Polish-American dating success stories [41]

sylablaw,

i am an american woman who has had no luck with american men. i have a polish-american success story, but i'm the american, and my fiance is polish. My fiance is so different than all of the american men i know, and his friends (who are all polish also) seem to be very different as well.

i agree that you should be yourself, and being open and honest is always the right way to go.

i know i shouldn't generalize about american men, there are good ones, it just seems very hard to find them. i can only speak from my own personal experiences and what i've personally observed, but i find the american men i've encountered to be very selfish. what i've experienced is men who are looking for women who make them feel good about themselves. they like compliments. they like having everything be all about them. many of them seem to think they are better than women, and that they can do very little in the relationship because the woman should be so thrilled to be with them. they seem to expect women to be supportive, attractive, cook, clean, and pay half of all of the bills. american men seem to be very unappreciative.

if my fiance is at all representative of polish men, i can see how you would find american men very disappointing.

have you considered sticking with polish men? otherwise my advice would be, just keep looking for that american man who is truly nice (because they do exist), and watch out for the super selfish ones.

wedzidlo

5 Oct 2007

Life / Gift for name day in Poland. My girlfriend's is Anna and today is her day. [17]

Merged: advice on name day gifts

hello everyone,

i'm not quite sure if i'm posting this in the proper area...

my husband's 'name day' is tomorrow. he's polish and has been in the US for just over 2 years. i am an american. we live in CT, USA. we've only been married 3 months, and this is his first name day since we've been together. (actually we had just started dating about a week before his name day last year, but i missed it because i had no idea!)

what is the appropriate thing for me to do as his wife on his name day? should i get him a gift? flowers? a card? a cake? i really am clueless, so any help would be appreciated. Thank you so much for your help!

wedzidlo

5 Oct 2007

Life / Gift for name day in Poland. My girlfriend's is Anna and today is her day. [17]

Thank you so much for all of your help! i went with a cargo net for the car (which he wanted) and a fragrance set. we'll probably go out to dinner too. he just found out he has to work most of tomorrow so i'm hoping the gifts will brighten his day a little a least. thanks!

wedzidlo

8 May 2008

Love / Pornographic Polish magazines [65]

hi everyone,

my husband has some magazines that are really upsetting me. a few months ago our friend went home to poland. while she was there she visited with my husband's parents and brought a few things back from them. the gifts for my husband included a stack of magazines, three of which were 'GT'. i looked thru the magazines to find tons of pictures of naked women on cars. i was a little upset that my husband's mother would send her married son these magazines, but what could i say since my husband didn't buy them.

last week, a brand new 'CKM' appeared in our bedroom. this magazine is filled with pornography, and I find it quite offensive. i'm guessing he got it at the polish deli. i can't read any of it because i can't understand polish, but there is actually a photo of a naked woman having sex with a plant!

i'm very upset because my husband didn't seem like the pornography seeking type. he seemed like a good church going guy. i've made alot of sacrifices to be with someone from another culture (and to sponsor him here in the US) because i believed in my heart that he was a good person. i'm just very disappointed to discover that he seems to be different that i thought.

i guess my question is, what is up with these magazines? are these magazines normal in poland? in the US, typically a married man's mother would not send him a magazine with pictures of naked women in it! that would be considered totally inappropriate. and most church going married men would not buy porno and leave it on their bedroom dresser for their wife to find.

can anyone tell me more about these magazines? what they are about/ who the audience is in poland? what magazines might be comparable here in the US?

thanks for any help! i thought at first i could ignore them, but i'm finding myself really starting to resent the magazines and him.

wedzidlo

8 May 2008

Love / Pornographic Polish magazines [65]

wow, not exactly the response i was expecting. some of you seem less than sympathetic. i do agree the best thing to do is to talk with him. if his reaction is anything like i've experienced here, i'll know he's the wrong person for me. thanks for the honesty, it has been eye opening.

wedzidlo

8 May 2008

Love / Pornographic Polish magazines [65]

well, thanks for the alternate responses. i was actually looking for information about the specific magazines. Polson provided some useful information in that respect.

wedzidlo

8 May 2008

Love / Pornographic Polish magazines [65]

okay guys, if these magazines are erotica rather than porno, they do not objective or show women as subjugated in relation to men. please tell me the name of the polish magazine for women that shows nude men in compromising positions so that i can order it for myself.

the fact that women are used as a commodity to sell anything is not something that i consider progress. as a woman, i'm pretty surprised at those of you who defend this, and i wonder how you would feel if it was your mother, daughter or sister who was in these photos.